Well this has to be one of the worst weeks of my life. You know when you get to that point you think you are going totally mad and dont know what to do with yourself.....well thats been the anxiety and panic part. Then the depression dont want to eat get out of bed or even talk.....so over talking to doctors, therapists, physchiatrists and actually anyone.
The stress in my life is so bad, dramas continuing from my seperation ten months ago just dont go away. Four children unfortunatetly mean I cannot cut all ties from my ex. But now all the children are taking sides and lies being told to and about me.....does not make you feel good and when have existing disorders just make ten times worse.
I have had to walk away from my whole family for sanity....my mum dad brother and my two eldest children, that now means I miss seeing my three grandchildren.....But could not let any of it continue any longer or I was going to end up in Hospital. What they dont realise but I might add should as they know how sick I have been is that by creating and being involved in drama will never make anything better.
After ten months have now been put back on Aropax....
Seems no matter what I do its never right....even my feelings are not aknowledged, I have talked to keep amicable but nothing ever seems to turn out how it should.
I feel empty alone unloved and lost....
Sorry today or this week has not been good just need to write. But feel I have lost everything