not sure how to start so... here we go.
I have been marries for 12 years, have kids 9 and 7. The last 4 years we have had issues with my side of the family. Well, we have not spoken to my parents for 4 years, and as result my sister as well. Caused a lot of family strain in my home.
Recently, about a year and a half now my wife has been real blue... tired all the time, stays up late and then is tired, she has too many things on her mind. Everything is HUGE, from the grass not being trimmed arond a tree, to the dishes not being emptied out of the dishwasher...
She has started to go to the Casino to 'get away from streeors' like family, work..... but, rarely will she say she is going. Normally, she is heading to the store or out with friends from work for a quick drink. Then she does not call or come home till 4-5 in the morning. She can stay there for 12 hours.... Money is a concern but her unhappiness is a greater concern. We have gone through her sorry stories and MT promices about not going back.. But, with any trigger she is there again.
Our sex life is non existant. Well that's not true we had sex 7 times the last week in August and before that it was week before the May long weekend. Now I have performance anxiety and can only last maybe 2-3 minutes at a time.... I am only 45 and I remember that I could at least hold out till I was out of breath or had broken into a sweat. Not any longer.... as soon as I get in I am almost done. THis is adding to her frustration as we used to have a healthy sex life.
I am thinking that maybe she should have a fling one night instead of the casino. I think I can live with that easier... I don't know how to tell her that it may make her feel special again and snap her out of this very low dark mood... HAs anyone else tried to spice up a marriage as a way to reduce the blues?