Finally the light comes on . . . sorta OT

CheerDad, I would like to thank you for sharing that. You are so brave to admit that you need someone especially after the mindset that you had growing up. I have also told myself that I don't need anyone and that I can get by fine without leaning on someone. That is what my mom ingrained in me after her divorce with my father. I also was very untrusting of men after the many things that my mother told me. I learned that I can't live like that. I am very lucky to have a husband, even though he gets frustrated with me, that understands and is patient. Again thank you for sharing that. It feels good to get it out and it also helps others.

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CheerDad, you are truly brave. Knowing something is one thing, and saying it is another. You should be proud of yourself for growing and learning as you have. I too feel like I've only needed myself in life, but am realizing that I need to accept help from others. There is truly nothing wrong with that, and gives us some relief. I have had this concrete wall up for all my life, and I am just a little tired of it. That hard exterior is no reflection of me inside. I am realizing how control plays a negative role in my success with others.

Thanks for sharing your story, and for getting it out! Makes me think of how I need to let go in my own life.

Good for you!
Carlita

Thanks all for your kindness. I don't feel courageous, I feel like a coward. Hiding from and hurting those who I came in contact with especially those I care about the most.

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Hey let's be real. I did not make the discovery that I needed help on my own. It wasn't until my wife had the courage to tell me that she could no longer live this way and I needed to find help that I realized I was messed up. If it had not been for her, I would probably still be the angry, isolating, hurtful person I was. The real hero here is my wife Angie and two oldest daughters. It was their courage to say get help or you will loose us if you have not already that forced me to seek help. Thanks again all for letting me share.

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Unfortunately, some people don't accept what they hear from someone else and miss out on what's important to them because of it. You obviously really love your family otherwise it really wouldn't have done anything to hear that from them. You are making a huge (let me repeat "HUGE") step in discovering what is really important. Just to know that they really care about you makes me believe that you are not giving yourself enough credit. You MUST stop putting yourself down.

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