change of heart...pity party over

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

temdr
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 11/27/2011 12:31 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi everyone. I had a heart to heart with myself and some reflection. I thought about the reason behind Thanksgiving...to stop and take a moment to be grateful for that which we are thankful for. I realized that my sons are at the top of the list. They are great young men. My oldest is an assistant manager for a huge company with stores all over the world. My youngest is a straight "A" student in college.

Yes, they let me down at Thanksgiving. But, after reading the responses here in my other thread, I was able to gain perspective. They are still young, making their way through life. They haven't had life experiences that come with time. I have been guilty of pushing away many friends through the course of this illness of mine. I simply won't do that to my sons. They do have many great qualities and they have helped me with things in the past. Whether it be helping me with my computer to helping me move into my apartment. They have also given their opinion on simple decisions that I have had to make. They have been there for me and that knowledge got lost in this situation over Thanksgiving.

I now realize that I was grieving the loss of my brother, mother, and daddy. My first Thanksgiving without all of them. Somehow all that emotion caused me to blame my sons to an extent which they didn't deserve. I won't push them away because I am disappointed. In the future, I will be aware to compromise around their schedules in order to celebrate the holidays. My oldest son lives about 6 hours away from me. He is coming for Christmas and I will welcome him (and his girlfriend) with open arms. I'm not sure of my youngest son's plans yet, but I will work around whatever he has planned.

I want to thank you all for your great responses and the ability to come here. Over the last 15 years of battling this illness, I have learned much and how to cope. It's still not perfect (as my recent meltdown illustrates). Maybe I will have the opportunity to share what I have learned with others here.

I would like to share my own personal motto...a quote that has served to help me cope. It is: Life is sustained by hope

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 11/27/2011 12:45 AM (GMT -6)   
So terrific to hear!!! And I think absolutely the right attitude. You have lost so many, it must have felt you lost them too.

I am very proud of you..it takes a big person to admit mistakes.

Our children are everything to us, but we need to remember that their lives are full of other people as it should be...We cherish the time we have with them and send them back into the world. We raise them all their lives to do just that.

They sound like terrific men and you should be so proud.

Take care
Maggie
"We never realize how strong we are, until being strong is the only thing left"
Major Depressive Disorder, ptsd, fibromyalgia, chronic pain, l3/4, L4/5 gone, bursitis arthritis sciatica


welbutrin HBP meds seroquel hydrocodone magnesium potassium multi vit

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20186
   Posted 11/27/2011 5:48 AM (GMT -6)   
thank you for sharing your enlightening post. with healing compassion, jamie
EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE PERSONALITY DISORDER,

RAPID CYCLING BI-POLAR DISORDER

REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42430
   Posted 11/27/2011 6:54 AM (GMT -6)   
Thanks for sharing. That really means a lot. I am glad that you see things differently now. It is hard. There is no doubt about that. We are very happy for you.

Take care,

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

sos007
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 615
   Posted 11/27/2011 8:27 PM (GMT -6)   
temdr...that is wonderful...I think you are right I think it was all the loss you have had and, I am so sorry for your loss.
Your sons sound like fine young men, they should make you very proud.

I myself know with this illness I have isolated myself at times. I think most sick people do
, two years ago I went back to work and now force myself to socialize more.

Take care and thanks so much for sharing.

Amy

chronic pain(nerve), fibro,ibs,and mild depression
New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Monday, June 18, 2018 12:07 AM (GMT -6)
There are a total of 2,972,687 posts in 326,006 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 160835 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, Donna Tomkins.
320 Guest(s), 3 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
Girlie, IntenseBloodyDiarrhea, Adagio