obessing. is. miserable.
It's like having a song in your head that you can't get rid of.
It can be good, like when I do crafts or renovations. But it is also very bad. My work is done well, but it takes me so much longer to complete it because of the obsessing. It is painful. It feels like my brain devotes a majority of its focus to one or two memories CONSTANTLY. I do try to stay busy, focus on other tasks or hobbies. It works for awhile, but not long enough yet.
Quite simply, I'm obsessed with obsessing. I've been able to calm more of the compulsive actions lately... self control I suppose?
It's doing a number on my anxiety, but I keep attributing that to the transition in meds. Being off the lithium and now starting these, it feels like I'm on nothing to help with the shaking. I feel like a freak, not being able to sit still but life happens and I'm doing what I can to control it.
Sheesh. I'm sleepy at work, but when I try to sleep, I can't be still enough to really rest.
I'm not going to stop whining now :) Thanks for listening