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Crimson Red Scarlet
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2011
Total Posts : 117
   Posted 1/13/2012 9:24 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi All,

I'm not sure what this post will be about or how it will turn out - I'm just rather bored since nothing seems to keep me asleep.

So far today, 5mg of Klonopin and 200mg of Benedryl (I don't have allergies or a cold). I will probably take a few more around 2200hours in the hopes sleep will come again. It is nice that both pills are pink - I'd hate to mix medication that is not colour-coordinated.

Here comes the ranting part of me...Things I hate when I am depressed to the point of S.I. (if you don't understand the acronym, I'm afraid this site will probably not allow me to explain it to you).

1. People telling me it will get better

2. People telling me that they are there for me, but I have to call them

3. Positive/optimistic platitudes

4. That CBT is some magical therapy that can help me cope and make it all better (I've tried it for 10 years...guess what)

5. Knowing I am completely alone in this; I'm not suggesting others are not suffering too but rather that no one can actually say or do anything to make it all better. Is up to me...But I have neither the energy and I just don't care anymore.

6. Being told to take care of myself...

7. Not being able to get any timely aid due to red tape

8. Being inundated by phone calls by family and friends to make sure I'm okay (that number presently stands at zero)

9. Being told to exercise. Really? I know it works, but that would require getting up and I have no inclination to do that any longer (easier when you drink minimally and eat once a day).

10. Over-paid and ultimately useless therapists

Feel free to add the the list...I can't help but be intrigued by what other major depressives are annoyed (not the potent word I'd like to use, but whatever).

Going off Cymbalta cold turkey is going well, thanks for asking. Just constant brain zaps...Better than a full-fledged panic attack.

Regards,

DarkWolf

P.S. Sorry for any typos, grammatical errors and misspelled words, but I don't have (or simply don't care) to read this over.

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 1/13/2012 10:35 PM (GMT -6)   
was this cathartic? jamie
EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE PERSONALITY DISORDER,

RAPID CYCLING BI-POLAR DISORDER

REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.

Alaskah
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2011
Total Posts : 285
   Posted 1/13/2012 10:37 PM (GMT -6)   
Being told to "just get over it" has always been a huge peeve of mine. It's so insensitive!

...or "don't think negative thoughts." Lol, if it were that easy no one would ever be depressed :)

I hope this was cathartic for you, as jamiee suggested. Sometimes we need a safe place to get stuff like that off our chests.

Crimson Red Scarlet
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2011
Total Posts : 117
   Posted 1/14/2012 2:37 AM (GMT -6)   
Hmm...And then there were two...

No, it was not cathartic.

I agree with both your pet peeves, Alaskah.

I think I'll refrain from "getting things off my chest"

Seems to make me angrier and for helpful posts to disappear.

Thanks to those who replied...but I think its time for DW to retire. It was nice meeting you.

Regards,

Natalie

Post Edited (DarkWolf) : 1/14/2012 12:42:49 AM (GMT-7)


awty
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2010
Total Posts : 790
   Posted 1/14/2012 5:59 AM (GMT -6)   
DW, I hope you do come back and post, now I am worried.

My pet peeve is not being understood. But I create that too as I never let anyone in to see all the muck (except for one friend)

daisy76
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 218
   Posted 1/14/2012 8:34 AM (GMT -6)   
Dw,
I hope you do too. I won't say any of those things to you, in fact I'm not very good with words now anyway. But I care. And I know ultimately we're all 'in this alone' as in our own seperate journey, but it's easier when we have people that care as we make our way through it.
Amber

"But that was yesterday and I was a different person then" - Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 1/14/2012 9:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Dark Wolf

I love your posts, so DARKLY funny and real...please don't stop, I promise you I will not sling platitudes at you.

I hate that look on their faces when they say crooningly like I'm a baby" so , How are you doing?"

Huhsband:
'If you'd get off your fat a** and do something, you'd feel better" Now there's some loving motivation.

Therapist
"Let's try this new medication..it's had good results" Yeah, the 18 ects I went thru were supposed to do that...what's next a frontal lobotomy????

and the winner is )as you said) "Make sure you call me if you need ANYTHING" First, I'm not going to cal because i am DEPRESSED and second, what could you possibly bring me, a tuna casserole? LOL

I tend to stay more angry with depression than morose and crying-I am really pi88ed lately, fed up

Please don't leave us DW, we need your caustic comments-getting over depression is not about finding unicorns and ***ter and mindless thoughtless grinning idioys...it is about hurting angry hurting people who are walking thru a nightmare, lost trying to just get out of the weeds...thanks for the post-I needed that

Maggie
"We never realize how strong we are, until being strong is the only thing left"
Major Depressive Disorder, ptsd, fibromyalgia, chronic pain, l3/4, L4/5 gone, bursitis arthritis sciatica

seroquel, hydrocodone clonazepam norvasc multi vitamin and magnesium

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42611
   Posted 1/14/2012 10:01 AM (GMT -6)   
DW,

I think instead of people saying don't think negative thoughts, they should say "hold on to the positive". That sounds a lot easier. I know that the negative come and go, but you can choose not to listen to it.

Getting better is hard, it takes time. Time and patience. (and patients, because it takes you to have them to talk to somebody). A really dumb kind of joke. I don't know where my head is at. lol...

There are old adedges to everything. You have to do what makes you feel better. And only you know what that is. Keep trying. Never give up. I am glad that you got off of the med without much discomfort. It is hard. So I feel for you. But I wonder if this is an unmedicated you talking and feeling so down. Can you try something else, or are you done with that route? There is 5htp and st. Johnswort and another that can help if you want to try something natural. Dephlin I think it is called.

We aren't giving up on you. So don't give up on yourself. There may be alternatives. Have you thought about a different counselor? That might help. How long have you been with this one? Maybe you are in need of a change...

Though starting over is hard too. Have to go through all the baggage again. I really hope that you feel better, I hate to see anybody feel so down. Hopefully you can find a bright side to look at.

Do keep posting. Don't give up...

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 1/14/2012 10:08 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey DW

I just got off cymbalta cold turkey too--it wasn't bad for me. Actually, I think I am thinking clearer (and angrier) than I have in a long time. I have cried twice in 3 weeks, mainly frustration at not being able to work anymore and why did God give me this great brain if I'm gonna sit here and fall into a persistent vegetative state?

Anyway, just wanted to let you know you have comapny in your sinking ship-lol

Come back
Maggie
"We never realize how strong we are, until being strong is the only thing left"
Major Depressive Disorder, ptsd, fibromyalgia, chronic pain, l3/4, L4/5 gone, bursitis arthritis sciatica

seroquel, hydrocodone clonazepam norvasc multi vitamin and magnesium

elfenprincess
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 96
   Posted 1/14/2012 1:30 PM (GMT -6)   
All the you listed annoy the hell out of me when I'm depressed too >.<

My parents like to tell me "You just need to get things going!" when I'm depressed. Exercise, go to bed and wake up early every morning (I have nighttime insomnia that not even sedatives help..), go out and meet people. Basically "just get over it."

Well hope you're doing alright and that you keep posting! <3

daisy76
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 218
   Posted 1/15/2012 1:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Dw,
In case you read this, I wanted to check on you. Please know that we care and hope you'll keep posting.
Amber

"But that was yesterday and I was a different person then" - Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

hep93
Elite Member


Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 12014
   Posted 1/15/2012 4:24 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi, Daisy! A forum member pointed out to me that you have the same tag line as I do. Did you copy mine? turn Of course, it's public domain and available to anyone.

Hugs,
Connie
hep93
Forum moderator - Hepatitis


"But that was yesterday, and I was a different person then."

Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Liver transplant recipient, Oct. 27, 2011, at Mayo Hospital, Jacksonville, FL

daisy76
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 218
   Posted 1/15/2012 4:32 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Connie,
I might have? I saw it under someone's name and have always liked Lewis Carroll. I think it pertains to most of us here lol.
If you'd prefer, I could change it.
Amber

"But that was yesterday and I was a different person then" - Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
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