Posted 4/13/2005 7:01 PM (GMT -7)
My major problem has been depression, I think - so I decided to write here. I also regularly read the fibromyalgia board and another board for borderline personalities. So, I've looked there, there, and here and don't find a place where I belong. Not just boards but in life...
I don't recall ever feeling so many low lows in my life (I'm 47). It used to be I was always pretty flat in my depression - I knew I had trouble having fun so that was what got me to a therapist the first time about 15 years ago. All my life though, I think I've been a pretty straight line a few degrees below everyone else. I hope that makes sense.
But lately it is changing....I'm having lows that are pretty low sometimes. I think a lot about what one thread here says I can't talk about. I want to or do cry, which has been a VERY rare occurance for me since childhood. I don't want to work and I'm a workaholic.
I also don't feel good. Nauseous, aches, pains, tiredness.
I'm sorry I'm not being very communicative but it is the best I can do right now. I don't even know what I want or why I'm writing....maybe someone else does. I'm also very lonely.
Work like you don't need the money,
Dance like no one is looking,
Love like you've never been hurt before...