Hello, Life, a Maze, and welcome to the Depression Forum,
Are you ready for the "nitty-gritty" of this person's behavior?
1. Games are engaged in by ineffectual people and they are destructive to people who engage in them. So he has at least one strike against him already.
2. Ineffectual people may be ones who have no consciences (one in every 25 people has no conscience--they are sociopaths). They do not recover and are not candidates for psychotherapy because therapy only makes them more cunning in their techniques. And they do not change.
3. He may be a narcissist, in which case he will drain you of all your energy with his ploys, then leave you without blinking an eye, because he is constantly seeking more "narcissistic supply" from new sources. He wilts without it. If he is continuing to contact you, it is because you have served effectively to supply some basic need he has that hasn't been completely fulfilled by the others he has used to supply his very, very weak ego.
4. My best advice is to get out of any association with him at all. That will be painful and difficult, but it will save you years of happy living with someone who is gentle, considerate of your feelings, loving, and affectionate, and most of all, faithful. These characters described above are not capable of that in their lives.
That's the truth, difficult as it is to accept. I hope you are able to get help for yourself to recover your self-regard. Psychotherapy is especially helpful in re-building your sense of inner security and happiness. Try to move on in your life.
There are some interesting sites on the web for people who have been taken advantage of by narccissists or sociopaths, or psychopaths, so you might find some ideas there to help you through if you can't afford to see a psychiatrist right away. I'd always choose a psychiatrist for help in these cases, however.
Good wishes on an early recovery and new and kinder life.
Post Edited (It's Genetic) : 2/16/2012 2:33:32 PM (GMT-7)