it's been a few weeks since I've checked in and shared, but I thought I'd pop in for a minute before going to bed. Just feeling anxious about so many things. Just finishing up the semester in school, in short-term debt, still owe the IRS, still separated, but the wife and I took a trip out of town...we made love...it was incredible.
Unsure about my future with my present employer, don't like the position I'm in, never have since being moved over from a previous division of the department, saw something happen to someone else today and how my department director is handling it and shifting people around with no real depth into their skill level. Scary. I think it's time for me to get as many certifications I can get from within the company and begin looking elsewhere for better employment and compensation long-term. Don't want to just jump out there to another job without buying my first home, due to my tenure with the company and the benefits that that has on getting a good loan, qualifying well for a purchase of my new home. So many things t think about.
Still not comfortable going back to my the church my parents attend, want to move on, but torn because I love them and want to stay close to them, they are much older now in years. Scared, challenged, excited, encouraged, sure on one hand, not sure on the other, don't want to be alone in my old years, I see that my spouse loves me so much and wants to be with me. Decisions. Prayers, choices....