Hi. I don't even know what to say. I have lived in my current
location for nearly a year, and I don't have any friends. My best friend lives an hour away, so I see her sometimes. I do have people that I see on a regular basis and and make friendly small talk with, but I don't have anyone to really talk to or to hang out with or anything. I did have one person, but we've kind of just stopped hanging out. I'm not really sure what happened.
I'm 26 years old, and I feel like my life is a complete waste. I have a full-time job, which is something, even if it is the most boring job a person could have. Other than that, I don't do anything. I live by myself. Really, I don't do anything. I go for walks when the weather is nice. I read, but sometimes that's to much effort, so I just watch TV. I eat too much because I'm bored and depressed. I go to church on Sundays, and I know a lot of people there. These are some of the people I make friendly small talk with. I'll be one of the first people in the room, and nobody comes to sit by me, but just a few feet away from me, someone who has come for the first time gets sat next to by a complete stranger who asks her all sorts of questions and introduces her to everyone around them. I feel completely alone.
I've decided it's my fault. I have to work hard to talk to people I don't know and to get to know them. I know that I'm a likable, fun person, but nobody else knows that except my family and my old friends that I don't live around anymore. For some reason, I have a really hard time being myself. I move around every once in a while, and I always tell myself things are going to be different. I'm going to come out of my shell and show people the real me right from the start and make lots of friends, and then I will be happy. But I inevitably resort to the old boring me that I despise.
Well, there you have it, world. Even if nobody responds, at least I was able to express myself somehow.
I don't want to be alone anymore. Is it pathetic if I move back home so I can be near people who care about
me? I'm not sure it would solve the problem because, although I love my family, I need friends outside the family too. All my closest friends are scattered around the country now.
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 3/12/2012 4:47:53 AM (GMT-6)