I was engaged to a man once upon a time. He led me on. I thought I loved him, I thought he loved me. One day I saw him with a lady and two kids. I kept my distance, because things just didn't seem right, a tad to friendly if you know what I mean. I saw him kiss her. I decided hey I'm going to see whats up with that.. I went to his work, they never saw me before. I snooped around and acted like I thought he was a hot guy and wanted to know if he was available... I found out he was married and had four kids. Why on earth a man would even produce a ring and ask hand in marriage whilst being married is beyond me. I approached him at work the next day, handed him the ring and said "I know your secret, your wife. I won't be apart of this, its over. Good bye" The look of shock, dismay on his face, but I turned around and walked off. Never talked to him or saw him again.
After that, I took to drinking... always had a bottle. I stopped going to church, thought how could God let this happen to me. A friend, a true friend noticed the bottle, change of attitude, not going to church and made me go to church. Helped me quit drinking. I got so depressed where (don't even think about
editing mods LoL) I *** myself before my friend helped me. I now go to church, I don't cut, I believe in God, I am no longer thinking of um if I can't say that word I'll say finishing the deed.
Honey, you have so much going on. Some of us have it worse. In the past month I have funerals not one But FIVE family memebers and I am helping my biological mother recover from surgery. I got my bipolar sister who refuses her medication cussing me out for everything on the end of earth and throwing things while even screaming "I WILL (BEEP) YOU!! I SWEAR I AM GOING TO GET A (BEEP) AND (BEEP) YOU". I have three sick dogs, one whom is paralyzed. Do you know who had it worse than me? Job. Job lost everything - he lost his family, friends, land, house, crops, everything. You know what God did? He paid Job back in tensfold (times 10) of what he had for remaining faithful in Him whilst losing all he had.
Now go get some comfort food, eat it. And keep us updated. Let her come to you. She is not worth it if she leaves you, she doesn't really love you then. Don't let this get you down - heck I don't with my sister. And if you are realy that depressed, go back to the doctor. Ask for a depression medication.
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 4/9/2012 5:13:03 AM (GMT-6)