So depressed i am angry

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New Member

Date Joined Apr 2012
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 4/21/2012 2:58 AM (GMT -6)   
I have hep c and cirrhosis of the liver. My life seems so different now, everything and everyone say stop feeling so down. I am trying to be positive and happy but it last for such a short period. I can't stop thinking what I am going to lose like my wife and my 3yr old son. It seems I am being selfish, when I should be happy to be alive. But every visit to the DR. seems to be bad news. I am scared, I won't be there for my son or wife. I just wanna start crying. I have no one yo talk to my wife says I am not the person I use to be. I am angry at myself and the world, but I only have myself to blame.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 2042
   Posted 4/21/2012 5:03 AM (GMT -6)   
With what you are going through your feelings are quite normal and very understandable.

Without going into a lot of babble and detail what it boils down to is that you are in mourning. is basically the same thing that people go through when they experience the loss of someone close to them.

Denial and Isolation

You can read about each of these at if you wish.

While each of these steps do occur the only one that occurs in any specific order is the last one. All the rest can happen at any time and can overlap each other.

I urge you to seek out some professional help. Find a counselor that you can work with who can help you work through what you are feeling as quickly as possible so that you can make the most out of each day. None of us knows how much time we have on this world and we need to try to make that time full of quality which is the one part we can control.

You have taken a good first step by opening up to us, and you are more than welcome to keep doing so. We are a very understanding and supportive group here but please consider taking that next step and adding a counselor to your support group.
2 confirmed herniated lumbar discs. Spinal Arthritis. Spinal Stenosis, diabetic peripheral nueropathy.
Moderator Depression Forum.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42208
   Posted 4/21/2012 5:36 AM (GMT -6)   

Welcome to the forum, and I am sorry to hear about your circumstances. Do get some help with this so that you may have been making the most out of each day. When my first husband got dxed with cancer in 2000. I made sure to make the most out of each day I had with him. I lived with full passion. But as Jim said, we never know how much time we are going to have. I should of been doing that each and every day. We learn though this. Do get some counseling to help you through. You never know what is going to happen in this world from one day to the next actually.

It took a lot of courage to write this post. Again, welcome to the forum...

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia

fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2012
Total Posts : 7295
   Posted 4/21/2012 9:17 AM (GMT -6)   
Your Anger is a good sign.  Anger is a secondary emotion.  Behind anger are the real emotions such as hurt, betrayal etc...
You are starting the grieving prossess which is very healthy.  So let yourself cry.  A lot of us can not do that.  If you can not cry with your spouse, than cry in the shower or car alone. But get it out! It is a step to mental health and handling your health issues.
I wish you the best in your struggles and God Bless you with healing!
Kabir says: "Student tell me, what is God? He is the breath inside the breath". from the poem Breath.

DX: reverse Trigeminal Neuralgia;Cluster headaches; Atypical face pain; raynauds;complex PTSD; MDD
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