Its been a few days since I last wrote. Things I must say are going GREAT! I went back to see my doc and she thinks the 20mg was too much so she put me back down to 10mg and gave me some cloramzapam for when i am feeling anxious, which i thought was odd at first cause used to only get panicy on the higher dosage. But I have let the drug do its think and I can say I hardly feel the depression at all anymore, and we have had two consecutive weeks of FDR for anyone who is not used to Newfoundland weather that is Fog, Drizel, Rain. I find the weather is a big mood buster but I have been doing quite well! The wedding is only 10 more sleeps away, and surprisingly enough I feel great, almost no stress. And have only had to use the cloramzapam twice. The only thing I still notice from before is like when washing. drying dishes or I am around sharp objects that can cause hurt, I think to myself be careful with this because its sharp and can hurt you. I know its not a bad thing but im consciously doing it. I would have thoughts of suicide while washing them or putting them away. I never thought I would do it but just knew it was sharp and could cause the harm. i hope that one day my brain will let that consciousness go.
Hearld, I am glad that the pills are working for you. I found even up until 6 weeks my mornings were low, and it would take me til after lunch to get my head in gear. I hope that the cipralex is able to help you deal with the ptsd better. I know since I have been on these pills I find i have weird dreams, and usually something that i thought about
or was doing that day makes its way into my dream. I have been trying to get rid of a bit of mild acne on my face and i've had this stubborn zit. i have this tool i use to try and clean it out before applying my cream to it. so that night i drempt that i was in the mirror using that tool and it pops alright but it covers my whole hand with puss it was gross .. either way if you need eyes to read and listen if it helps we are hear! People tell me if you write it down it lets u'r brain take a break from it for a while. dont know if theres any truth to it, but ya never know.
I'm now at day 12 on 10mg Cipralex. It's helped me so far to some extent. I find that things improve as the day goes by. Mornings are pretty low for me, and some days are moren tense than others. Trying to manage what has been described as ptsd arising from childhood troubles, I've been told that my subconcience takes over when sleeping, and so I'm still under the influence when I wake up.
I have a review with my doc in 10days, so maybe we'll go for a higher dose.
Hang in there everybody.