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Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/10/2012 9:30 PM (GMT -6)   
Does anyone ever feel like the worm on the hook at the end of the fishing line, and who they want to be with, is at the other end of the fishing rod being held by the person who is fishing with the fishing rod.

I don't know if that question makes any sense.

I have basically been alone all my life.

Yes I have lived with my parents, but they have no idea of the emotional pain I feel when I am emotionally rejected on account of my health problems.

Yes I have been married(1992-2000). But my (ex)wife couldn't grasp the concept of marriage when saying her marriage vows. She finally admitted four years after I divorced her, that she had emotional problems. When we were married, she hoodwinked the immediate family members into believing I was the only problem in the marriage.

Yes I was engaged(2002-2007). My (ex)fiance had a host of problems from her past that she used against me to lie to the authorities

I know I am sounding like a broken record. I am just so alone.

Sorry for rambling.

Post Edited (Chris516) : 7/11/2012 2:26:54 AM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42501
   Posted 7/11/2012 7:05 AM (GMT -6)   
Ramble away Chris, that is what this forum is for. Often when we write things down, it helps us to feel better. So this is therapeudic in ways.

I am sorry that your marriage didn't work out after all them years. That must be difficult for you. But know it wasn't anything you did. It was her illness.

I am sorry that your ex fiance lied to the authorities. Did it get you into trouble? I hope not.

It is hard when we hook up with people with emotional problems, especially when we got out own. Don't be hard on yourself. Take care and keep posting.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/11/2012 9:42 AM (GMT -6)   
Thank you Karen, My (ex)wife still thinks she can just hug n' kiss me, regardless of the fact we are divorced. I divorced her for a reason. So when she hugged n' kissed me at our son's high school graduation last month, I was not happy. I had divorced her twelve years ago. But that same inappropriate behavior is still a problem. I am not being biased towards my ex-wife. But saying that, I thought she would have learned something about not behaving inappropriately by now.

In terms of my (ex)fiance, I was never arrested or received a warning.

I am hard on myself because, while I could definitely be more discerning in what woman I would want to be involved with, my own physical health problems are a key factor. My (ex)wife said she could accept them, but told me a year after we separated, that she had always wanted my health problems to "just go away". My (ex)fiance didn't think the way my (ex)wife did. But instead, while she could deal with my physical health problems, emotionally, she kept 'diagnosing' me. She did this, even though she is not even a clinician.

Post Edited (Chris516) : 7/12/2012 10:48:16 AM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42501
   Posted 7/11/2012 11:52 AM (GMT -6)   
I think that there are a few people in this world that do that. Self diagnosing. It isn't fair. But we know that is in their heads and we know what is true and what is not. I am glad that you are away from both. Do you see anybody now? Just curious. I know you have a close internet friend, but wondering if you are in a relationship.

It is funny how some people act like your (ex) wife. They think they can just come in and do whatever. I am glad that you stand firm to her and let her know what you think.

Keep up the good work. You do good for all that you are going through.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/11/2012 1:52 PM (GMT -6)   
Karen, I have been in 5yr.(Friday will be our fifth anniversary) long distance relationship with a woman that lives out in New Mexico. She has accepted me without question. The key is she has OCD. While I have thought of ways to re-direct her OCD(instead of treating the OCD like it was meat and I was tenderizing it, just to stop a compulsion), so it possibly could relieve some of the stress from the OCD. The lack of communication gets to me.

I was even accused of having 'White Knight Syndrome', by someone(not you) on this website. Since I have health issues and want to be accepted romantically, why would I not want to be accepting of someone else that has a disability.

Post Edited (Chris516) : 7/12/2012 7:42:49 AM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42501
   Posted 7/11/2012 2:10 PM (GMT -6)   
I hope you weren't accused of that on this forum. Because I didn't see it. I would of not liked that. I am hoping you can help her ocd. I hope that the relationship works out.

take care,

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/11/2012 2:20 PM (GMT -6)   
It wasn't in this forum, I don't think.
Christopher

Brain Aneurysm, Hydrocephalus, Epilepsy

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42501
   Posted 7/11/2012 4:01 PM (GMT -6)   
Oh good.
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/12/2012 10:03 PM (GMT -6)   
I am still dealing with emotional rejection on account of my health like I said, when I started this 'thread'. I was even feeling suicidal all morning. I did talk to my fiance today. But only for 30mins.. Tomorrow(July 13) is our five year anniversary. But I still feel alone.

I feel like life holds me at arms length.

Post Edited (Chris516) : 7/12/2012 9:09:45 PM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42501
   Posted 7/13/2012 6:09 AM (GMT -6)   
Try enjoying what you can. Even if it is just little things. Maybe you are feeling alone because of your internet friend being sick. Enjoy your anniversary.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/13/2012 6:40 AM (GMT -6)   
Yes, It could be, because she is sick. I still don't know, whether she is going to survive, or not. That has me sad all the time.

I will try enjoy my anniversary.
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