Life and "friends"

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elfenprincess
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 96
   Posted 7/13/2012 10:32 AM (GMT -6)   
I feel so out of place among people my own age for the most part. One of my good friends is back in town for the summer and she's introduced me to some of the people she knows. I hang out with them, and things are alright sometimes, but a lot of it just seems superficial and boring. Everyone wants to get drunk and talk about things that seem really dumb or annoying...or just watch youtube videos or play video games.

And maybe part of the reason I've felt especially out of place around these people is because I've been seeing a (MUCH) older guy. I'm 21 and he's 41. It's become strange for many reasons...I just feel alone in life again. But actually, before I started hanging out with these so called friends, I spent time alone and had more confidence in myself that way. After coming home from parties I usually feel anxious and reminded of how different I am. The people I should be able to turn to, I feel isolated from, and this older guy who may be really BAD NEWS is the only person I look forward to seeing really :(

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42436
   Posted 7/13/2012 10:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Sounds like something I can kind of relate to, but I hang around people of all ages. My husband is 16 years older than I am. My girlfriend's husband is also 16 years older than she is. But she is 29 and I am 53, but we still hang out and have fun conversations. But she doesn't hang out with people her age because of the same reason as you. The way you feel is perfectly okay. You are just probably mature for your age. That happens. I was always with older people when I was younger. My first husband was 18 years older than I was. I lost him to cancer in 2000. But yea, now it is strange because a lot of my friends are younger. Oh well. I wouldn't worry about it, also it doesn't sound like you drink and get drunk. When you aren't drinking, you see the people who are and yes, they act imature and kind of silly. They don't see it though because they are drunk. I don't drink much anymore either. Though I did on and off for years. I lost the taste for it, and also don't like the buzz anymore. I guess we all are different. And we do change. But that is normal. Don't feel out of place though, just realize you want different things out of life than these other people do and maybe you have outgrown them.

I hope that you have a good day today.

Take care Elfen...

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Chris516
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2012
Total Posts : 80
   Posted 7/13/2012 1:00 PM (GMT -6)   
Karen, I am like you. Not necessarily in terms of marital age difference(ex-wife 3mos. older, ex-fiance 1yr. 4mos. younger, present fiance 9mos. older), but in terms of losing the taste for it. Beer to me now, tastes like liquid vomit or foot odor. I just drink Coca-Cola if I am not drinking milk or water.

Post Edited (Chris516) : 7/13/2012 2:11:45 PM (GMT-6)


elfenprincess
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2011
Total Posts : 96
   Posted 7/16/2012 1:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Yeah I think I've always been attracted to people who were at least a little older than me. The alcohol thing is...well, I still drink here and there, and I like to get crazy and silly (actually probably wilder than anyone at parties sometimes, I can't really control myself when I get really drunk haha), but I have a big problem with people who devote their whole lives to partying...to the point where they neglect everything else and are just....argh...I get so angry about it. Not to mention it's dangerous and the hangovers are gross lol but you're right, I think everyone's entitled to drink, we all go through our phases with it, I just get upset seeing people ruining their lives over it...:(

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42436
   Posted 7/16/2012 6:17 AM (GMT -6)   
It is hard to watch somebody destroy their life drinking. I have seeen a lot of it where I live. There are a lot of drinkers in this little town. It is sad, and when children are involved it is even worse. And those children grow up to be like the parents. I have seen it over and over. I stay away from it actually. The best that I can. If there is neglect, it needs to be reported. I hope that there are no kids involved.

I hope that your day is nice.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies
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