post holiday blues

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Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 39
   Posted 5/8/2005 7:00 AM (GMT -6)   
scool  Hi All
How do you cope with the post holiday blues? We had a wonderful time away-but now have to come to terms with reality. Have been very down for last few days and don't really know why. The financial probs are almost sorted and I'm back to work full time. Have to say am finding that exhausting but know it will get better.
Some positives - had first councelling session last week. Many tears but helpful I think.Will be attending weekly for next few months - will keep you informed. One thing that cme out has made me think - I have(had?) a very effective shell-the person who could deal with everything in a calm and sensible way. Practical to the end - just deal with whatever it is and move on. You know - superwoman - marriage, family, high pressure job, always 'doing'. That is not how I feel - I am that inadequate, fraudulent, lonely and scared individual. Anyway concellor described it as the 'proffessional, logical shell with the trapped and terrifies little girl inside'. Somehow that just seemed to sum it up!
Feel better for sharing - will be in touch next week to get back into swing again.
Luv and hugs

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 4151
   Posted 5/8/2005 10:17 AM (GMT -6)   
I tend to get depressed when I have looked forward to an event and after the event has passed there is nothing to look forward to. You get that "let down" feeling however there is no let down. So I am constantly planning things after things to make myself happy and in turn it hikes my anxiety up. It seems like I lose either way. There is a name for that that my psych told me however I don't remember it. I will try to remember what it is.

I am glad to hear that you had a good counseling on your first visit. Its funny that you mention tears. I am so sensitive that when I walk in the door of my psych's office I automatically tear up. (before getting into the session) I think that your therapists description though is right on the money. That sounds a lot like me as well.
"Slow down and everything you are chasing will come around and catch you."
- John De Paola

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 5/8/2005 6:31 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi, Stumpy,
Been wondering where you have been. Nice to see you again. Listen, people with depression go through every day life just like everyone else. "The perfect person"??? No such animal. There is no one in this world that has a wonderfull life, great job, professional, great kids and a great marriage. That's near to impossible. As far as I know, each family has it's own "dark clouds" to cope with. If people have perfect lives, why the heck are we here on this site and other sites and support groups. What you are feeling is felt by a lot of people who suffer depression. We don't feel worthy enough or good enough or good wife and mother enough. We critisize ourselves and call ourselves names. I do it all the time. If I drop something, I say out loud now, "Sue, you're such a dumb a**and can't even do that right". Whatever I was doing. I have low self esteem. Most people who are depressed have a lot of the same symptoms. I think I am trying to deal with them and then try to turn my life around where I feel I should be. None of us asked to be put here on this earth, and for whatever it's worth, we (most) have had trauma in early years. Pray about it and please don't be so hard on yourself. We all care for you and the Lord loves you. That;a why he died for us.
There is no such word as can't. Can't simply means wouln't. Grab as much as life as you can. Future is a long way away for those who don't believe. Don't build a foundation of life on sand. It will take it away with the tide. Love a little more, be unkind a lot less.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 8616
   Posted 5/8/2005 9:01 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Stumpy,

Yes . . great topic. I used to watch my kids come home from church camp and go through the same thing. (I watched for it because it happened to me) I think you have this great time away and escape reality and then come back to face reality. It IS hard.

And yes, I find myself wearing 'masks'. I have a 'mask' for work and and 'mask' as a daughter, a mask as a friend, a mask as a church goer, a mask as a mom. I call it 'acting my part'. But, it seems I have all these different people inside me. I used to wonder if everyone walks around acting their part. Sometimes I think sensative people are more proned to depression. . . hmmmmm .
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Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 39
   Posted 5/9/2005 12:46 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks all - the clouds are lifting a little. Had a difficult weekend, climaxing in a real cathartic sobbing session. Husband v. v. v. supportive, but left feeling drained. Hope that this week will be better.

I soooo agree with the 'masks' thing. One of my current issues is that now the masks are down who am I? I feel like a mosaic or jigsaw puzzle that has been blown apart - which mask/role is the real me? I really don't know anymore - hope councelling will help there.

Will keep in regular touch now I'm back!

Luv and hugs

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