Just joined this site but I really need some advice. Here are the basics: I live in Peru (I'm an expat from the US) and I was dating a Peruvian guy. We were together for six months but recently he broke up with me, giving no reason other than the attraction was suddenly gone. It came completely out of the blue and has shaken me to my core, especially since I felt like we had something really special. We had never had a real argument or anything. I gave him two weeks to think about
it (in which I didn't contact him at all), and then when I saw him after those two weeks, he cried and said that he had been feeling awful and that he is depressed (has trouble sleeping, burying himself in work, feels empty, joint pain, no interest in sex), even though he had never felt that way before. He hadn't told anyone else. He said he missed me, but he still didn't want to be in the relationship.
I have had depression for as long as I can remember, and I also have PTSD from a rape two years ago (he knew about
all of that). I said that I would support him as much as he wanted, but that he needed to see a doctor. I don't think he's done this step yet, but he's trying mindfulness and other things he can do on his own.
The truth is, I'm so confused about
the relationship and whether he dumped me because of the depression or because of something else. He still won't tell me why, other than that the attraction is gone, but he wants to be friends. It's really hard because I don't know if I can be his friend because I'm hurting, but I also can't just disappear and never contact him because he's depressed (and no one should have to go through that alone). I'm so confused (and hurt, angry, in need of closure, and sad in a foreign country)!
Any advice would be welcome.
Post Edited (traveler01) : 9/13/2012 2:14:09 PM (GMT-6)