Posted 8/15/2005 3:50 AM (GMT -8)
I feel awful today. I didn't sleep hardly at all last night, my stomach is upset, but I'm at work at least for the moment I am. I may go home if I don't get to feeling a bit better. I just don't understand any of this. I want to get better. I want to get better with the depression. I want to get better with the thyroid situation. I want to get better with sleep. I just want to feel well and healthy and today I simply don't feel like that. I see my counselor tonight. I'm glad. I know god doesn't give us more than we can handle, but this is almost to much for me. I don't understand why I have to go through these things. I can't I be a regular person, a healthy person. Why does everything have to seem so much harder for me. I may be going home. Im at work but the rest of me just isn't in it today. I'll have to talk to my supervisor this morning and see what kind of vacation time I might have left, but at the same time that wouldn't do me any good either. I'll just have to turn around and come in tomorrow. I need a job where I don't have to commute, where I don't have to get up at 4:15 every morning. Its going to be a long day today. Oh well at least I do see my counselor tonight. I'm just ready to get well. I'm ready for things to be stabble. I can't remember the last time things were stabble in my life.