What happens when we drink is it numbs our emotions while we are drinking, the bad thing is that it is a depressant, and after we lose the buzz, or numbness, it makes us more depressed.
To me it sounds like you are dealing with a lot of anxiety. If that is the case, that is probably why you didn't feel good on the wellbutrin. You probably need to take something like xanax with it. I take an anti depressant, xanax and a mood stabilizer too. So I got it coming from all directions.
Your problem could be both substance abuse and boredom. We like alcohol because it makes us feel different. I use to drink but I barely drink anymore. I like making wine though. But my drink of choice was beer. I felt like I didn't have control of myself when I got a buzz off of alcohol. That kind of scared me, but it did relax me. I drank off and on for awhile. Got into a little trouble with a friend when I drank. So I stopped. Plus it makes me feel full though.
There are a few antidepressants though that have anti anxiety properties in them. I really feel like anxiety is more of the problem. You can tackle that without antidepressants. But as I mentioned before, the alcohol will depress you. Especially the day after you drink.
Have you thought about
counseling? They could teach you ways to handle things without medications. If you don't want to take medications that is.
Here is a site that might help you... www.moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome
I hope that it helps you some. You have been going through a lot, I think...
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies