You've done a great job expressing yourself. Kudos to you. You have really been through a lot.
I would start by saying that Heather is right. You really need to talk to your doc about your feelings of suicide even if they are fleeting.
What you have suffered through your accident is a real loss. You will need to go through a grieving process which is similar to losing a loved one. Only for you, it is mourning the normalcy you felt before the accident.
When people have chronic illness they often go through this grieving process and their loved ones may go through it too. Life as you knew it is changed. I haven't read it yet, but there is a book out called "Good Grief". I have it on hold at the library, but I'm sorry I don't know who the author is. It is said to be a very good book about the grieving process.
I just want to make sure you have given yourself a proper chance to heal (mentally).
Don't be too hard on yourself for your feelings after a fight with your girl friend. I have five brothers and I can remember the many, many times of heart-sick days for them.
Keep us posted!!!
In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie "We can't control the waves, but we can learn to surf!"
UCTD (Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease), Hashimoto's, Plantar Fasciitis, Inflamatory Arthritis, High BP, GI Inflamation, Diverticuloses
Plaquenil, Methotrexate, Folic Acid, Synthroid, RX Motrin, Lexapro, Amitriptelyne, Salagen, Lotrel (Centrum Silver, B12, B6, Calcium+D,)