I am new to this Forum.I am in relationship with my boyfriend since a year and half.He is my first boyfriend and i lov ehim for true and its the sam ealso from his side.But I'm a very short tempered person.The first year we were living in together as he was in my country doing the ERASMUS programm.We understand each other very well .He is veryfaithful and so am I.But th elast we would fight a lot.Mostly because of me.I would get irritated for very small things and I would destroy th everything in the room.
My poor boyfriend would pick them up and has lots pf patience.Then i would abuse him when I lost my temper..and also his family especially his mother.I would call her names and my we would fights over that.But at the end he would always make me understand that what I was doing was not right. His parents also cam eto know about
my fighting nature and warned him to stay away from me.The knew i would abuse them.Then after a year he went back to his country and we are still in the relation as He is very honest.His parents were against him coming to meet me.He had to wage a war at home to try to convince them.He sufferes a lot at home as eveyrtime his parents taunt him because of this relation. feel very bad...because i love him for true.But I cannot control my self when i loose my cool.and i start abusing him and his whole family he keeps on tolerating it !!!!I feel very bad for him.Sometimes I think ,I dont deserev a guy like him.I told him many times i will break up..but i just tell so..as i know i will never only in that moment when i loose my cool i tell so many horrible words,I curse him,tear our pics and when i m normal go and print them back !!I hate my behaviour
i think IM depressed sometimes.
I compare him to other boyfriends and fight with him.He tolerates also that.And the worst part is that I fight with exactly before his exams and he his not able to concentrate..I keep on calling him and when he answers I start offending so he doenst answer my calls..tehn i block him on fb nearly 100 times I did this.Then again i apologise and we r friends back again..I dont what happens to me once I loose my cool.I m very very short tempered.I loose my cool only with my boyfriend and get irritated only with him.Im normally a very good person.I never was like this!!!!This is also affecting my studies as once after a fight Im so pissed off I have no concentration more.My boyfriend supports me always on how to study and so in vevry way possible.sometimes I expect a lot from him.
I SHOW THE ANGER OF HIS FAMILY ON HIM.I know his family hates me.so when i loose my cool i show all that frustrtaion on him.Im really scred of my behaviour
.As i dont want to loose him and regret later!!!He suffereing a lot because of me.!!!The only problem in my relationship is my offending and my short tempered nature!!!!!that too only with him!!!!!!!!!He is a gem of a person.Now as we r in lobg distance we dont fight that much as we used to.!!!but when we fight its worse..as I keep on offending and never stop..a small reason is enough for me.When we fight he doesnt liek me and tells he needs mature girl unlike me!!!!!!I hate my behvaiour sometiems i fight i block him i tell i break up with him then i cry.Then later i feel bad for treating him badly...Im fed up.I dont want to contiune in this way..........I KNOW I LOVE HIM...AND WE WNAT TA FUTURE TOGETHR..BUT MY ANGER IS SPOILING EVERYTHING !!!!PLZZZZZZZZZZ HELP ME :( ;(
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 5/20/2015 1:14:52 PM (GMT-6)