I don't know what to do

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New Member

Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 11/6/2005 1:08 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey my name is Justin. I just found this site and I was hoping that this would be a place where I could find people who can maybe understand what I'm going through. I guess the first thing I should do is give y'all a little background on my situation. I am 20 years old and was just recently diagnosed with depression. In addition I am also epileptic and due to this I have had to have surgeries on both of my shoulders and currently I am unable to work or drive. I am living with my grandmother and aunt but both are completely useless to me. My primary source of support is my mother who lives across town and is also unreliable. Recently my girlfriend of 2+ years dumped me and I still don't know the reason why. She's seeing some other guy for the time being even though we still talk and at times it still seems like there is still hope. During this recent period though my emotions have been all over the place. For example today all I felt was this strong feeling of disgust towards everyone. I am a nice guy but lately all I feel are these negitive emotions. From time to time I even have suicidal thoughts like that I would feel better I put a knife through my heart or if I fired 2 guns 1 on either side of my head. This is not who I want to be. I want to be me again. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 4151
   Posted 11/6/2005 1:19 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Justin,
I'm sorry that you are going through a hard time. Are you on any medication or going through therapy right now for the depression? A lot of us that post on the depression forum also post on other forums here which means that with chronic illness almost always comes depression. I just wanted to welcome you to the site and know that we care here.
Hugs, Des
Co-Moderator ~ IBS Forum
"Sometimes I'm afraid, and I don't feel that tough...But I'll stand back up" - Sugarland
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New Member

Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 11/6/2005 1:31 AM (GMT -6)   
I just started seeing a psycoligist about a week ago and he recomended anti-depressents but wants my neuroligist to handle any meds I might take. Thank you for welcoming me. It's good to know that people care.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 8616
   Posted 11/6/2005 3:07 PM (GMT -6)   
Welcome Slippyjms!

Dbab is right. Chronic illness most always brings deprssion. Even with a good attitude, the tole on our bodies from dealing with chronic illness can delplete the "feel good" chemicals in our brain. Thus there can be a real physical need for anti-depressants. I hope your doc is able to find the right med or combination of meds to help you. The therapy can be a great help too. Just looking at things a little differently can also put everything into better perspective. I hope you'll keep us posted on how you are doing.

Healing Well also has an epilepsy forum. I bet they could benefit from things you have learned and I'm sure they have a lot of things to share as well.

Keep us posted!!

In His Grip,
AlwaysRosie          "We can't control the waves, but we can learn to surf!"
Psalms 139
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