Hi Morcego. Marijuana definetely causes one to dwell too much on things. It's not good for over thinkers
Also, at your age I worried about
where I was going and what others thought about
me also. Still do at times and I'm 38. We are molded by movies, friends, our parents, etc... so what you say is really you.
You sound like you are just trying to figure out your place in the world Morcego, I hope you find it
Take care, Softy