hi all. I went to my first therapy appointment yesterday. not sure how I feel about
this therapist. he listened to me, asked the right questions and all but I'm not sure what will happen next. my goal was for him to give me some coping strategies to deal with my husband's depression but I left with the feeling that he wanted to help guide me towards separation/divorce. perhaps I gave mixed messages as I did talk about
the possibility of divorce if I don't see my husband changing for the better sooner. I have moments when I see some improvement then my husband makes hurtful comments. at this point, I just want a professional to remind me that my husband's depression is not my fault and when he makes these hurtful comments, it's not him speaking. I also want a professional to tell me how to react when my husband makes these comments. so I will give him another session before I give up as I didn't find the first session helpful (I understood it was an introduction).
things I failed to mention. when I first discovered his depression, my husband wanted to separate as "the passion is gone" in our relationship as he put it. we've been married for almost 6 years by this point with two young toddlers and both of us have been overworked. I still love him very much and did feel the passion dying but I could not believe he wanted to separate over that matter when he admitted that he loved me from the bottom of his heart.
more recently, (like last week), he told me to move on, to not wait for him anymore when I told him I was willing to divorce him in October since I was so tired of being the one to constantly push him to take meds, to make sure he eats, etc. he told me I needed to move on to be happy and not waste my life. yet when I asked him what it was he really wanted, he replied, "I don't know."
did you guys ever say this to your spouse during your most depressed state? I know those who are depressed should not make any life changing decisions when they are at their worst, but it's hard to hear such things coming out of his mouth and not believe they are true.
how long did it take you to find the right combination of meds to work for you? and when it did, how long did it take for the meds to be effective? I've been reading more about
ketamine and forgot to bring it up to his pdoc last weekend. has anyone tried it for their depression?
Post Edited (ilovepuppies) : 8/18/2016 11:17:25 PM (GMT-6)