Posted 11/8/2016 8:53 AM (GMT -6)
You're grieving. There are stages to grief. I wish I could quote them, but my brain is non compliant just now.
I agree with cutting out the other substances. Alcohol is a depressant and makes it harder for our meds to do their job.
As for outpatient...it helped me tremendously. Just being in a room of people that 'felt' the way I did, and knowing that at the door...not having to 'explain'...was a relief. Hearing what others were struggling through helped me judge just where I was at on my mental scale. Some days better, some days worse. It helped. Hearing others' coping skills and finding more things to try out myself helped. Sharing about the things that helped me, helped.
Just like a cold virus affects some people 'worse' than others, and different remedies can help, we all need time to recover. Some bounce back quickly, some have symptoms linger longer. Be gentle with yourself. Treat yourself the way you want to treat another and the way you want another to treat you.
I learned to cook myself a good full meal, set the table with the 'good china', light candles, play nice music, in other words 'treat' myself. The fact that I was 'finding myself worthy' of the effort made a good difference in my day. I found myself dressing nicer, paying more attention to personal hygiene, wearing a bit of fragrance, it all did wonders for me. "Look good/feel good" therapy. I still practice this today.
Looking back...which is the only way I seem to learn...I realized that first of all, I don't attract everyone I am attracted to. Those I did attract were generally attracted to surface things, as I was too. The 'deal breakers' were different with most, though. One breakup was caused when I stopped drinking but the other person didn't want to stop what they were using. Another breakup was caused by the other persons' insecurity. Another breakup was because of the others' selfishness. Of course, my part was my own stubborness and inability to compromise. I guess my point is, there were attitudes that were 'rejected', not ME. Attitudes can be adjusted and sometimes they should be. YOU were not rejected, just one aspect. For some, these aspects become deal breakers. Of course, it hurts to be the one left, but it is the only way to 'make room' for the one we are supposed to be with. Each break up brings us closer to that one.
I'm glad you found us. Keep posting and let us know how things are going.
multiple surgeries for rotator cuff both shoulders with residual chronic impingement syndrome, ulnar nerve transposition, carpal tunnel release, wrist ganglionectomies/denervectomies/tenolysis, multiple herniated discs, tarlov cyst, whiplash, bursitis of hips, tendonitis, torus, 3rd degree shoulder separation, torn labrum, ovarian cysts, fibroid tumors of the uterus