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DAILY THREAD NO. 160

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Depression
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BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator
Joined : Apr 2012
Posts : 8557
Posted 2/5/2017 11:22 AM (GMT -7)
LAST POST from 159

Happy Turtle :

i will remain positive and hopeful for peter. the reality cycle of gaming is apart of their world, however it is just as destructive. i am too close as i have a brother living in this world.
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BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator
Joined : Apr 2012
Posts : 8557
Posted 2/5/2017 11:35 AM (GMT -7)
Peter, I too hope that you get that job in the alien movie. It would help your self-esteem greatly.

However, I do want to point out, that this work is it or miss. Frustration at best. As you pointed out not very neat and tidy, secure. I would like to again suggest finding a regular paying job that will give you regular cash flow.

In the end. All that was said at the end of the last post, I believe was out of frustration trying to help you.

Try to take it that way, I know it is hard to read post where people are discussing you like you are not there, I am sure it was not meant malishishlly. [sp?]

As to your question of waiting 6mos to contact someone for assistance. I believe that would be a bad idea.

Peace
Trina
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F27
Veteran Member
Joined : Missing Key Value : en-US, 577 2016
Posts : 964
Posted 2/5/2017 11:52 AM (GMT -7)
Disagreed Turtle. Gaming is a healthy diversion for many. There's a social aspect to many games that allow people to connect to peers across the world. The stereotype of a gamer as a basement-dwelling recluse is exactly that, a stereotype. Gamers come from all walks of life, just like those of us who are afflicted with depression.

I'm with NCOT on this (quelle surprise - she's my spirit animal, after all), maybe Peter bothers people because he reflects back parts of ourselves that we would rather not see. Negativity a problem? C'mon - this is the DEPRESSION forum - dealing with negativity is pretty much our leitmotif.

Peter, Ambling noted that you appeared to be improving, and I agree. Learning the subtleties of dealing with neuro-typicals is something we can do for you just by being engaging. I, for one, will work hard at doing that - not through any sense of obligation, but mostly because I like you.

This problem of outliers keeps popping up. There are always going to be depressed people who find their way here who don't fit the narrative. That doesn't mean, however, that we can't learn anything from them and that they can't learn anything from us.
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BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator
Joined : Apr 2012
Posts : 8557
Posted 2/5/2017 12:16 PM (GMT -7)
I am going to say one thing about negativity.

It can be covered in number 11 under guidelines in Forum rules. Yes we expect a certain amount. However there comes a point were flaming other people constantly for the past can produce a spiraling down of certain members.

Yes the rules also state to ignore bothersome posts.

As moderaters we try hard to keep an even balance, not easy I can tell you.

I am requesting that this discussion be ended. I do not see where it is helping anyone. I am sure Peter at best feels uncomfortable, others feel worse.

We are one family, where views are mostly respected. let us get back to that. We all have diagnosis that challenge us daily. We come here to get support, vent a little and get validation. Lets not loose sight of our combined strength and courage.

Peace
Trina
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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44942
Posted 2/5/2017 12:52 PM (GMT -7)
Well put Trina and sorry I missed the changing of the posts. Getting too wrapped up in them and not paying attention to the number. Thank you so much for doing that.

Yes, I believe it is time to move on. But we do have to go by the rules. And flaming isn't permitted, besides it keeps Peter in a bad place (the past). We are going to make him focus on the present so he will be happy.
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NiceCupOfTea
Elite Member
Joined : Jan 2010
Posts : 11009
Posted 2/5/2017 1:01 PM (GMT -7)

F27 said...
Disagreed Turtle. Gaming is a healthy diversion for many. There's a social aspect to many games that allow people to connect to peers across the world. The stereotype of a gamer as a basement-dwelling recluse is exactly that, a stereotype. Gamers come from all walks of life, just like those of us who are afflicted with depression.

Spot on.

Gaming, like almost any other activity you care to name, is only bad for you if taken to extremes. I have a soft spot for video games and think I will always have at least one game on the go. (For a long time it's been Geometry Dash. Don't laugh; it's really good, especially with the new 2.1 update <_<.) I look back with affection on video game odyssies such as Final Fantasy VII, Zelda: Ocarina of Time and Devil May Cry, and wish I could play these games for the first time again.

I even was admin of a particular games forum for a few years. The guys (there were a few girls, but it was mostly guys) were a pretty intelligent and diverse bunch overall. Most were in higher education and one was doing a PhD in Maths. But they were very into their videogames as well. They would make awesome combo videos, which took more creativity and skill than I could muster up (to be fair I was suffering badly from Crohn's at the time; that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it >.>) The girls tended more towards creating artwork and fanfic around their favourite characters.

This is a long-winded way of saying that videogaming can be a fun, creative and relaxing hobby. I don't think we should really be judging people for playing games or watching TV to be honest; if you'd rather not do those things, all power to you. But please don't make judgements about TV or videogames turning people into mindless zombies - I personally think our media and education has a lot more to answer for on that front, but that's another story.
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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44942
Posted 2/5/2017 1:48 PM (GMT -7)
It can be bad if taken to extreme though like you said NCOT. A lot of people live for it. I think it depends on the moderation used. You can get addicted. Like they say, moderation in all things.
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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44942
Posted 2/5/2017 1:52 PM (GMT -7)
Remember F27, it takes all kinds. With depression too. Give Turtle the same respect that you want him to give to Peter. What comes around, goes around.

And though some of us get negative, there is nothing wrong with wanting to be around positive people. Or have a positive atmosphere.
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NiceCupOfTea
Elite Member
Joined : Jan 2010
Posts : 11009
Posted 2/5/2017 2:55 PM (GMT -7)
Karen, I got addicted to the internet (or, more accurately, a website) years ago. The internet isn't that innocuous and yet here we all are.

There's nothing wrong with preferring to be around positive people. To some extent I actually feel the same way now. I feel too old and too tired to be taking on board other people's melodrama and moaning. It's fine on the internet, but I don't want to be dealing with it in real life. My 64 year old aspie chum has a violent alcoholic neighbour who used to call him every day and harangue him for ages. (They've since had a 'domestic' where she stabbed his hand with a dessert spoon and he called out the police, so they are no longer on speaking terms.) The neighbour tried to befriend me, but, somewhat guiltily, I ignored all her texts and phone calls.

I don't mind people who see the world in a negative or cynical way, but they've got to chill with the drama, yo.
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pitmom
Veteran Member
Joined : Jan 2015
Posts : 2777
Posted 2/5/2017 6:50 PM (GMT -7)
One of the things I have learned since I got sober 21 years ago...

I am not everyones' messenger.

If I feel I can be helpful to someone, with a word or a suggestion, I share it.

I was told early on to change People, Places & Things.

Insanity was defined as "Doing the same thing, over and over, expecting different results."

Some posts I skip. Simply because I am either in a bad place myself or have no experience with what the persons' struggle is. "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open ones' mouth and remove all doubt."
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BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator
Joined : Apr 2012
Posts : 8557
Posted 2/5/2017 8:12 PM (GMT -7)
Pitmom, well said. I had an uncle, well my grandmothers boy friend who had 'herbs' in the basement.

Hee hee heee, he used to tell me little golden tid bits. I remember some almost every day. Such as this one.

" A wise man, listens. Looks in your eyes. A fool will speak and ask you why!" LOLOL. I loved uncle Lou. I would say. " why what?", Lou would answer, "You will know when you are old enough to know when to listen." Now, I understand. Well a few years back lets say.

Peace
Trina
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Lynnwood
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2005
Posts : 8003
Posted 2/6/2017 12:14 PM (GMT -7)
Ugh. That's all I have to say about today. Just UGH.
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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44942
Posted 2/6/2017 12:36 PM (GMT -7)
I hope your day gets better Lynnwood.

Hugs, Karen...
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F27
Veteran Member
Joined : Missing Key Value : en-US, 577 2016
Posts : 964
Posted 2/6/2017 4:22 PM (GMT -7)
Heheheh Lynnwood ... 'ugh' is a good descriptor for the day. What can I say? Too much snow, too few plows; too much work, too few brain cells; too much sidewalk & driveway, and not enough stamina.

On the plus side, Netflix's new show, Santa Clarita Diet, had me chuckling all day.

Stay warm, or cool everyone - whatever works for you.
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Sometimes i am me (HT)...
Elite Member
Joined : Mar 2009
Posts : 22120
Posted 2/7/2017 4:50 AM (GMT -7)
trina i would appreciate my post be deleted in your thread at the start. i have deleted others of mine here. i said a little bit on my update thread. i have let karen know that i am going walk - about.

good-bye for now...
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F27
Veteran Member
Joined : Missing Key Value : en-US, 577 2016
Posts : 964
Posted 2/7/2017 9:48 AM (GMT -7)
So yeah, tripped over my own feet and fell down the garage stairs yesterday. Still managed to clear all the snow from the sidewalks and driveways in our little conclave, but I'm a hurtin' Albertan today.

Anyone have a spare Motrin? Or Fentanyl? Yeah that would be the ticket. ;-)

Have a fun day all!
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BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator
Joined : Apr 2012
Posts : 8557
Posted 2/7/2017 12:08 PM (GMT -7)
Ok HT

Glad you weren't seriously hurt F27
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Chartreux
Veteran Member
Joined : Aug 2006
Posts : 9664
Posted 2/7/2017 9:03 PM (GMT -7)
I'm sorry I've not posted, I'm not in a good place and will see therapist on Thursday which is not soon enough.
I have to think of a possible life change, Hubby was mean to me last week emotionally and I ended up crying and then falling in bathroom when I was cleaning and ended up with a very long scratch on my back and I cried most of the day....Not sure what to do we've been married 30 years ...just really sad. There is a book I plan to get, hope it has some ideas...I think some time apart might be good, but not sure where to go...why did this happen?
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Lynnwood
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2005
Posts : 8003
Posted 2/8/2017 11:27 AM (GMT -7)
Having a hard day, here. All the little stuff is conspiring against me & getting me down. Shaking things off, one at a time, and doing the next right thing -- only to get stymied at every turn!!!

I need a snuggle & a hug, or two, or many!

Hope y'all are having more cheerful & productive days than I.
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F27
Veteran Member
Joined : Missing Key Value : en-US, 577 2016
Posts : 964
Posted 2/8/2017 11:45 AM (GMT -7)
*hugs lynnwood*
*hugs lynnwood again*
*hugs lynnwood again*
*hugs lynnwood again*

No snuggles though, I'm way too married for that. ;-)

Stay strong.
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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44942
Posted 2/8/2017 12:36 PM (GMT -7)
Hi Lynnwood,

I am sorry you are having a tough day. It is the little stuff that gets us. My day started out rough but is better now. Know we are all here for you and hope to put a glimmer of hope in your day.

Many gentle hugs,

Karen...
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PA_grandma
Veteran Member
Joined : Nov 2010
Posts : 3669
Posted 2/8/2017 1:57 PM (GMT -7)
Just checking in.
Weird weather we're experiencing.
Breaking a heat record today...almost 70 degrees
...and tomorrow morning we're expecting eight inches of snow.
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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44942
Posted 2/8/2017 2:50 PM (GMT -7)
Wow Joyce,

That will probably be a difference in temperatures of about 40 degrees. In one day. Though we have had that happen before. I hope you don't get a bad windy storm. Keep us posted.

Hugs, Karen...
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Cappuccino
Regular Member
Joined : Aug 2016
Posts : 102
Posted 2/8/2017 6:56 PM (GMT -7)
I've decided to start a blog, again. I had one before, but I deleted it. I'll mainly be using my blog to rant and post my thoughts up from now on, because I just don't find forums are very useful anymore. I've made quite a few threads already at forums talking about how online communities aren't what they were years ago, and it seems I'm not the only person who doesn't enjoy them so much these days.

Anyway, IMDb are closing their forums on 20 February, so here's to the end of an era...

Peter you can post your blog in your signature or in your profile but not in your post. And we aren't suppose to advertise other forums on here. Sorry...

I did read part of your posts on the other forum, and you are doing the same thing again. Telling people all about your past and talking ill of others. You are doing the same as you were. You know it isn't healthy. But it is your choice.

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 2/8/2017 7:24:07 PM (GMT-7)

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NiceCupOfTea
Elite Member
Joined : Jan 2010
Posts : 11009
Posted 2/9/2017 1:39 AM (GMT -7)
If you post your blog link in your signature (go to My Profile at the top of the page to find the settings), I'll take a look.

Social media has largely killed off forums unfortunately. I'm grateful that HW is still active, but most of the forums that I used to post in have gone by the wayside. I'm pissed off IMDB is closing its message boards actually: I never posted there, but I enjoyed browsing the message boards. Reviews just aren't the same thing; for one thing you can't post spoilers in reviews.
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