University Life Ruining Everything For Me

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Pretty Little Liar
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2017
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/25/2017 9:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone..

So the thing is that I've recently joined a university not recently though it's been a year since I've been there but it still feels like I don't belong here. I don't know if I'm being paranoid here or not but ever since I've joined this university I've felt depressed. It's been more than 4 5 months since I've been feeling empty at this place I mean I have friends but I don't think they understand me and I'm always trying to do things like nice things there but everything gets ruined some way or another..

Should I leave the university? Should I tell my parents about it? I'm not sure if the university has a counselor but if there is, should I go up to him and tell him everything?? It's just messing with my life so much and I'm not having good thoughts about my life.. I don't know if you guys understand or not but I don't think I can survive..

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 41931
   Posted 4/26/2017 4:12 AM (GMT -7)   
I think if you tackle your depression, the university life would be much easier. Talk to a counselor at the university and see what they say. I don't think that it is ruining your life, I think that depression is making it harder than it should be. How are you doing in your classes?

I don't want to see you quit something that is so important if you don't need to. Try counseling first and then decide.

Welcome to the forum.

Hugs, Karen...
Moderator-Depression


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

pitmom
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2015
Total Posts : 2186
   Posted 4/26/2017 7:54 AM (GMT -7)   
New places and new situations can wreak havoc on us emotionally.

Do you live on campus? The accomodations themselves could be partly to blame. Is your room dark, when you were used to a sunny room at home? Noise? Cleaning solutions or building materials that you are having a negative reaction to?

Personally, I don't like meeting too many 'new' people. I've always thought of myself as a square peg trying to fit in a round hole.

Focus on WHY you are there. University is for education. Sure, there are social aspects to it, but the primary purpose is to learn academics. Is your being there fulfilling that purpose?

Consider alternate possibilities. Much is accessible online now. No need to suffer.
multiple surgeries for rotator cuff both shoulders with residual chronic impingement syndrome, ulnar nerve transposition, carpal tunnel release, wrist ganglionectomies/denervectomies/tenolysis, multiple herniated discs, tarlov cyst, whiplash, bursitis of hips, tendonitis, torus, 3rd degree shoulder separation, torn labrum, ovarian cysts, fibroid tumors of the uterus

Tim Tam
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2016
Total Posts : 1109
   Posted 4/26/2017 11:01 AM (GMT -7)   
Did you like high school?

Is it being around other students that you don't like, being away from home?

Is the college too at away from you home to go home on weekends, or what not?

Are the courses too tough?

You say, "I have friends but I don't think they understand me and I'm always trying to do things like nice things there but everything gets ruined some way or another."

Did your friends in high school understand you?

You say, "Should I leave the university? Should I tell my parents about it"

If you left, what would you do about work or further study?

I think you do need to let your parents know about your dissatisfaction.

Yes, a counselor might be good.

You say, "I don't know if you guys understand or not but I don't think I can survive."

What is your level of pain, 0 being the worst and 10 is feeling you best?

Again, you say, ""I don't know if you guys understand." Yes, a lot of people here understand. That's why we're on this website.

Pretty Little Liar
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2017
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/26/2017 11:15 PM (GMT -7)   
getting by said...
I think if you tackle your depression, the university life would be much easier. Talk to a counselor at the university and see what they say. I don't think that it is ruining your life, I think that depression is making it harder than it should be. How are you doing in your classes?

I don't want to see you quit something that is so important if you don't need to. Try counseling first and then decide.

Welcome to the forum.

Hugs, Karen...


I don't think my University has a professional counselor.. I am a really good student but lately I've been falling behind.. I can't get my work done and I can't concentrate anymore

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 41931
   Posted 4/27/2017 12:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Can you seek out a professional counselor. Most uni's have a counselor of some type. I hope that things get better... Keep on keeping on, that is all we can do. One day at a time.

Hugs, Karen...
Moderator-Depression


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Pretty Little Liar
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2017
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 4/27/2017 8:45 AM (GMT -7)   
pitmom said...
New places and new situations can wreak havoc on us emotionally.

Do you live on campus? The accomodations themselves could be partly to blame. Is your room dark, when you were used to a sunny room at home? Noise? Cleaning solutions or building materials that you are having a negative reaction to?

Personally, I don't like meeting too many 'new' people. I've always thought of myself as a square peg trying to fit in a round hole.

Focus on WHY you are there. University is for education. Sure, there are social aspects to it, but the primary purpose is to learn academics. Is your being there fulfilling that purpose?

Consider alternate possibilities. Much is accessible online now. No need to suffer.


No, I don't live on campus but I spend most of my time there. Yes I'm trying my best to clear things out of my head and just take one step at a time..

Derwood
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2016
Total Posts : 294
   Posted 4/27/2017 4:14 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi PLL; welcome to Healing Well. I'm sorry for the anguish and uncertainty you are dealing with.

Is this your first year of university? Some people find they have to
change to a different one after there first year. Do you suppose that
might help?

I think it's a shame that your school doesn't have a councillor, but
you may benefit from seeing a private councillor. I would deffinetly
give strong consideration to discussing this with your parents. Do you have a good relationship with your folks? If you have a healthy
and open relationship with your family then I would discuss this with them. They may have health insurance that would cover the cost of
private councilling.

Also, have you considered some of the questions that Tim Tam has posed? ie : do you have any idea what you might do if you leave
the school? Could it be that you are missing the life you had before
starting university , such as your group of high-school friends, or
perhaps you may feel that you chose the wrong studies? If the later
is the case, I think you can switch courses without losing credits during your first ( and maybe second ) year.

I think you should continue to find the answer to your question.
I encourage you to get as much feedback as you can before you make the decision to leave the university. I will go as far as to
suggest that you keep studying until you know of a better plan for your future happiness.That may include studying at a different university.

I applaud you for seeking answers. That is a great startsmile
Feel completely free to continue writing in with your thoughts and
questions. I'm sure you realize that the choices you make now will
play a big part in what you can do in the future.

With kind regards,
Derwood.

eddyvogel
New Member


Date Joined May 2017
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 5/1/2017 5:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Pretty Little Liar said...
Hi everyone..

So the thing is that I've recently joined a university not recently though it's been a year since I've been there but it still feels like I don't belong here. I don't know if I'm being paranoid here or not but ever since I've joined this university I've felt depressed. It's been more than 4 5 months since I've been feeling empty at this place I mean I have friends but I don't think they understand me and I'm always trying to do things like nice things there but everything gets ruined some way or another..

Should I leave the university? Should I tell my parents about it? I'm not sure if the university has a counselor but if there is, should I go up to him and tell him everything?? It's just messing with my life so much and I'm not having good thoughts about my life.. I don't know if you guys understand or not but I don't think I can survive..



hiii buddy... make some efforts to find your internal will, find reasons why are you feeling like this dont make things so complex ..make simple as possible .. do talk with your fellowones.
if you choose to run away then the probabilty to happen the same situation with you will incease.. well try to settle down things calmly. make new resolutions for your behaviour to tackle these conditions...mind is just a software do whatever you want to do with it just make some efforts.
best of the luck.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 41931
   Posted 5/1/2017 8:04 AM (GMT -7)   
Eddyvogal,

Welcome to the depression forum. Thanks for the supportive post. I hope you stick around.

Feel free to start your own thread if you would like to.

Hugs, Karen...
Moderator-Depression


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies
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