Thank you for the replies.
Pitmom, I will definitely try the kitchen timer routine. I live alone and I am on disability and I live in the High Desert in Cali. I have limited income so I can't even afford cable TV. I do have Netflix though. Before my depression, I went through MAJOR stress and upheaval. I basically had to move "wherever" I could to keep a roof over mine and my (rescue) pets head. That was my one and only criteria. It took me 5 months to unpack even though I had all the time in the world.
It's interesting that you mentioned visualizing your Son's funeral. Just last week I took my 16 1/2 year old dog into the vet thinking it was "time." He no longer wished to be with me on my bed (heartache) and he was laying in "corners" of the apartment. It turns out he has Dementia. He doesn't always know who I am or where he is but he does enjoy his treats and about
every 3rd day or so he feels like going for a walk. I had been "dreading" this day for years as I've watched the decline in his heath. As someone with a username "pitmom" I'm certain you can understand. I love the Pitties! You are very strong to be able to allow yourself to "go there." I spend most of my life *avoiding* triggers. I call it "existing."