Sexual Problems

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

Andy1986
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2012
Total Posts : 1111
   Posted 11/7/2017 9:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi all

Was wondering whether any men here have gone through something similar to what I'm experiencing at the moment.

I've recently started seeing a woman and having sex for the first time since my depression really started to hit about 5 years ago. It hasn't been a smooth experience to say the least and I'm pretty sure something isn't working right but not sure what. The problem seems to be with the little man staying up to the task. I'm pretty sure there is no physical problem as I can get erections and everything, so I'm wondering how much my depression is affecting it.

At first I thought maybe it's just some performance anxiety, and my female friend was very understanding about it. She knows I get nervous very easily so we carried on trying. But it just seems to be something else happening because it doesn't just happen with her, it happens when I'm on my own as well. I can be really enjoying myself but cannot keep the erection, even if I go right to orgasm, it will come back a few seconds before the end.

We finally managed to have sex but even during I was not at 100%, more like hovering between 75% and 90%. But I was still really enjoying it. After 5 years it's a little hard for me to remember to be honest what sex was like before but I'm sure I never had this much issue keeping it up.

I'm wondering whether it's just the underlying depression I've been recovering from affecting me. It's hard to know because since I started with it I have barely had sex as I didn't really feel up to it. I've been on my current depression medication for a couple of years now. It's a fairly low dose as I tried to go higher but had side effects with heart palpitations. I'm wondering whether it could be the medication causing problems but at the same time this medicine really helped one of my physical symptoms and I also don't want to halt progress by unnecessarily switching ADs.

My doctor wasn't really much help when I discussed it with them. They asked some questions to rule out a physical problem then just said it was an emotional problem. But that doesn't really help me deal with it. I discussed it a little with my dad (awkward...) who has had depression and he had sexual issues with it, but he said he just couldn't have sex at all, the little man didn't work. My problem seems a bit different.
Anxiety, Depression, Chronic Psychogenic Pain (Nausea, Chest Pain & Abdominal Pain)
Current medication: Nortriptyline 50mg, Pregabalin 200mg & Esomeprazole 20mg

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 41836
   Posted 11/7/2017 9:27 AM (GMT -7)   
Have you tried Viagra or anything else like that? What is your age? It could very well be the medication, but other things can factor into that. I would talk to the doc about the Viagra or something like it.

Best wishes,

Hugs, Karen...
Moderator-Depression


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Andy1986
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2012
Total Posts : 1111
   Posted 11/7/2017 9:34 AM (GMT -7)   
getting by said...
Have you tried Viagra or anything else like that? What is your age? It could very well be the medication, but other things can factor into that. I would talk to the doc about the Viagra or something like it.

Best wishes,

Hugs, Karen...


Hi

No never tried anything for it. I'm only 31 so don't know if that's a bit young to be considering it. I guess if all else fails it may come to it.

Tim Tam
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2016
Total Posts : 1083
   Posted 11/7/2017 12:17 PM (GMT -7)   
It's the medicine.

Even when I miss one of my blood pressure pills, my interest in sex increases.

Anti-depressants, stabilizers like Lithium for bipolar, bring down the sex drive.

The depression itself also reduces the sex drive.

But to the degree that you talked about, I'm not sure if there is not another factor. But then if you don't take those meds, things can be worst.

Sometimes it's a tough choice. My blood pressure pills affect another part of my life, including socialization, and if I think someone is coming over and I want to enjoy the conversation, I sometimes leave off my a.m. blood pressure pill, or hold it back until after the company leaves.

Sometimes I enjoy the company very much, but I don't enjoy the chest pain which comes from hold off of my b/p pill.

Life can get kinda difficult.

BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2012
Total Posts : 7148
   Posted 11/8/2017 9:39 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Andy

Men are not the only ones with this issue.

There are women like myself who during the course of healing realize they have always, always faked, ya know.

It is hard to stop the override of protective actions by our minds and medications.

My STRONG suggestion is m e d i t a t i o n.

Even if you have to do 1-2 mins of grounding breathing in the bathroom before activities. A clear mind is a fun mind.

I meditate daily for many things. Chronic pain, anxiety etc... and yes intimacy. Even if it is cuddling.
Takes a little while to feel the impact of the meditating [there are many diff types of meditation] however when it hits you, you have this feelings of control.

You immediately pull a short meditation out of you back pocket to help you when needed. Hint: You do not have to be seated in the lotus position to meditate.

I hope this helps you.
Trina
Moderator - Depression

"...when the gift of sight is cause enough for jubilation."
Billy Collins from the poem. HIGH

DX: reverse Trigeminal Neuralgia;Cluster headaches; Atypical face pain;Hemicrania Continua; raynauds;complex PTSD; recurring MDD,disassociative disorder;

BnotAfraid
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2012
Total Posts : 7148
   Posted 11/8/2017 9:41 AM (GMT -7)   
T T

careful with that chest pain.... stay safe please.

Peace and strength
Trina
Moderator - Depression

"...when the gift of sight is cause enough for jubilation."
Billy Collins from the poem. HIGH

DX: reverse Trigeminal Neuralgia;Cluster headaches; Atypical face pain;Hemicrania Continua; raynauds;complex PTSD; recurring MDD,disassociative disorder;

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 19920
   Posted 11/9/2017 1:29 AM (GMT -7)   
yep, it's all about the relaxation.

NiceCupOfTea
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 10019
   Posted 11/9/2017 3:25 PM (GMT -7)   
SSRIs are notorious for causing sexual dysfunction. I would bet it's the SSRI over anything psychological. Unfortunately there's not a lot which can be done about it if you are affected in that particular way. A different AD may be better, but I can understand your reluctance to switch if you are otherwise stable. Did you talk to a GP or a psychiatrist? It sounded like you were rather fobbed off there.
Dx Crohn's in June 2000. (Yay skull)
Tried: 5-ASAs, azathioprine, 6MP, Remicade, methotrexate, Humira, diets.
1st surgery 20/2/13 - subtotal colectomy with end ileostomy.
2nd surgery 10/7/15 - ileorectal anastomosis. Stoma reversed and ileum connected to the rectum.
Current status: Chronic flare. Do I have any other kind?
Current meds: 50mg 6MP; Entyvio (started 3/11/16)

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 19920
   Posted 11/9/2017 10:18 PM (GMT -7)   
i'd go back to the shrink, or discuss it. ncot is correct, a lot of ssri's are notorious for this. sometimes a med combo can do this as well. i found this out with a water works tablet. it will pass.
New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Tuesday, November 21, 2017 8:57 AM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,896,232 posts in 317,883 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 157473 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, Johncb88.
405 Guest(s), 15 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
LymeBug21, RedSparrow, Doggiedo, Casa11, Johncb88, adamas, Missouri, Jaxy, BJD55, Sherrine, ASAdvocate, quincy, SharonZ, k07, straydog


About Us | Advertise | Donate
Newsletter | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer
Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
©1996-2017 HealingWell.com LLC  All Rights Reserved.