I hoped your spirits managed to lift themselves. Hopefully in time you can remember earlier, happier times with your mum, instead of dwelling on the final months.
Resentment has always been one of the hardest emotions for me to deal with: it's poison which harms only the person doing the resenting, not the resented, but knowing that doesn't make it magically go away. Thus I don't have any great tips. But I would try to keep contact with them to a minimum.
The African violets sound like a lovely gesture...
Dx Crohn's in June 2000. (Yay )
Tried: 5-ASAs, azathioprine, 6MP, Remicade, methotrexate, Humira, diets.
1st surgery 20/2/13 - subtotal colectomy with end ileostomy.
2nd surgery 10/7/15 - ileorectal anastomosis. Stoma reversed and ileum connected to the rectum.
Current status: Chronic flare. Do I have any other kind?
Current meds: 50mg 6MP; Entyvio (started 3/11/16)