I know there is a fibromyalgia section and I have posted there. But I decided to move my thread here because depression is where I'm at right now. I've been depressed since as long as I can remember. Hospitalized a few time and I'm on a ton of meds.
I'm 46 now and was just feeling well again for the first time in years. I had a good job with 18 years seniority and a wonderful husband and three beautiful chldren and everything was coming together. Finally, depression and anxiety were no longer the main focus in my life. Then Jan 5th everything changed. I caught a cold and had extreme fatigue.
The cold went away but the fatigue did not. Everything hurt and I couldnt keep my eyes
open during the day or night. I slept more and more until I literally went to bed when I got off work and woke up the next day 30 min before I had to leave. This went on for months until the fatigue started affecting my job. I was calling in sick all the time because I coudlnt get out of bed. I felt so miserable at work I had to leave early. I lost my lead position and became a problem employee but I loved my job so much I kept trying but I kept getting more tired.
I worked until I dropped I had to quit my job in the middle of a shift. I was sobbing and I'm still sobbing. I lost my wonderful ICU job June 12th 2018 and all I do is feel sorry for myself and angry at this turn of events. Angry for losing my job, my pension, my work friends, my life! I'm not even a very good stay at home mother. I'm so tired I've lost interest in all my hobbies. I'm sick of the tv. I have 3 friends and they're busy.
My husband is busy being a work-a-holic which needs to be done since I no longer have an income. I'm not independent anymore. I can't support myself. Hell, I can't even stand long enough to cook for myself. By the time my husband gets home from work at 7pm I'm exhausted, starving and depressed. He's tired of me. Tired of listening to me complain. Tired of me sleeping all the time. Tired of me just sitting on the couch watch tv. I can't do anything else but he latched on to something the doctor said. "You have to retrain your body to be awake so limit your naps and get up and do something." Easier said than done. I have fibrobyalgia. I've been in a flare since january 5th 2018 and all I can do is cry. The medication is not working. Everyone is tired of taking care of me and I don't know what to do. I can't drive the car so I can't leave the house so I'm on this forum because I don't know where else to go,
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 7/26/2018 10:04:06 AM (GMT-6)