hey Nice, you remind a bit of my BIL - he had a funky, spoiled type upbringing, never learned any legitimate life skills, got kicked in the nads too many times physically and emotionally, put a little too much effort into meth and now is a total mess - he's back on our property after almost a year of flailing around in the world unattached -
Yeah, great. If you count being bullied by 3 older brothers with nobody stepping in throughout my entire childhood and putting zero effort into meth, I'm sure I'm identical to your BIL.
Okay, I've seen your second post. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit annoyed by the first one, but I do take your point now. You may be right about
your BIL being need to be "reprogrammed". Hell, maybe that's what I need too. Unfortunately, apart from excruciatingly expensive drug rehabilitation centres, I don't know of any such facility available. One thing I have considered is returning to studying and trying to get a degree in something practical, like IT. But that is a) expensive and b) hard work. You need a lot of self-discipline to study as an adult. But it does give a focus and and an end goal - is that something the BIL could do or is he too far gone?
@iPoop - Not yet! I am considering waiting until after Christmas, when, sadly, there will probably be a glut of unwanted puppies and dogs.
@Hedgie - I'm sorry :-( I hope you feel better tomorrow.
I think there were a couple of reasons why yesterday was so bad for me. First, I had a really upsetting dream that I tried to forget about
as soon I had woken up and realised it was a dream. But I think it stayed with me and affected my mood. Second, I had a couple of conversations on Twitter which frustrated me. The second was the worst one.
In both cases they were people trying to help me but inadvertently ended up making things worse. The first woman ended up asking me did I really want to get better? No love, I just love being depressed and suicidal almost as much as I love having Crohn's - I don't want either to go away.
The second convo was with the guy who gave me advice on volunteering. He kept on trying to get me to see my GP and I kept on saying there was no point and trying to explain why. (Long waiting times, seen her lots of times already, nothing new she could do for me.) He then said something about
how you can only get get better if you want to get better. That irked me, and I said something like I'm sick of people with depression being blamed for their own mental illness. He accused me of twisting his words and said goodbye. (He did at least manage to wish me well, so I will give him credit for that at least.)
Can't remember what I said but whatever it was, he started speaking to me again. He tried to strike up another convo but I couldn't face talking, so I didn't answer.
I can't see becoming friends with this guy unfortunately. Firstly I don't really like the overfamiliar way he addresses me. It reminds me of somebody else and I need that like I need a hole in the head. That said, that's not as bad as his hypersensitivity: I've seen him accuse others of being rude and blocking them over things said that I wouldn't think anything of personally.
I knew it would only be a matter of time before I offended him and so it proved. I can't have a friendship where there's a lot of arguments. I'm negative: if you can't accept that about
me then don't be friends with me.
I am living an awful lot in my own head and I would like to get out of that though. I just can't relate to anybody enough to get out of my own head for.
Dx Crohn's in June 2000. (Yay )
Tried: 5-ASAs, azathioprine, 6MP, Remicade, methotrexate, Humira, diets.
1st surgery 20/2/13 - subtotal colectomy with end ileostomy.
2nd surgery 10/7/15 - ileorectal anastomosis. Stoma reversed and ileum connected to the rectum.
Current status: Chronic flare. Do I have any other kind?
Current meds: 50mg 6MP; Entyvio (started 3/11/16)