Welcome to the forum!
You are not hopeless! Plus you are not alone!
Journaling is a great tool to use with PTSD. I have been using it for 8 years.
There are other ways to handle it also. I have going to post a link to a free site that I use on a weekly basis to inspire me, keep on the positive side of daily life. https://www.mindful.org/the-magnificent-mysterious-wild-connected-and-interconnected-brain/
Keep posting here so we can support you in your progress. Many of us are going or have been thru what you are dealing with.
Peace and strength
Moderator - Depression
"...when the gift of sight is cause enough for jubilation."
Billy Collins from the poem. HIGH
DX: reverse Trigeminal Neuralgia;Cluster headaches; Atypical face pain;Hemicrania Continua; Complex Migraines: raynauds;Complex PTSD; recurring MDD,disassociative disorder with psychotic features. Laryngopharyngeal Reflux Disease [LPR]