Welcome Red Rain,
Interesting handle. Any special reason behind the choice? Just wondering.
I have just come to the end of months feeling as you do. It is serious to handle alone. So glad you reached out. You have landed in a soft, validating and support place.
Do you have any pets? I have always had dogs. Had fish for a while also, but to much with the tank, filter etc...
Walking helps me, sitting the park and watching kids. I watch baseball. Don't follow it or any team, I enjoy the game, the plays etc....
Most days I have force myself to do things, but once I get going I feel better.
We deserve more than we feel, I practice self-compassion and mindfulness.
I honestly would not know where I would be without these skills in my daily life. Heck these aren't even skills anymore, it as become a change of life style for me. I have become more thoughtful and gentler in many ways.
Here is a link I hope that will help you. https://www.mindful.org/how-mindfulness-may-change-the-brain-in-depressed-patients/
I meditate. There is a app INSIGHT TIMER, download on your phone. It is free. If you don't find something you like uninstall it. There is music of all kinds, beginner guided meditations. I would say it worth a look
they are organized by categories and they also have groups.
Peace and strength
Moderator - Depression
"...when the gift of sight is cause enough for jubilation."
Billy Collins from the poem. HIGH
DX: reverse Trigeminal Neuralgia;Cluster headaches; Atypical face pain;Hemicrania Continua; Complex Migraines: raynauds;Complex PTSD; recurring MDD,disassociative disorder with psychotic features. Laryngopharyngeal Reflux Disease [LPR]