Thank you for your time. I am trying so hard to stay emotionally up. I start to wonder if it's me that is depressed at times.
But I will keep trying because even if I have lost him as a partner, I don't think I could bear losing him as my friend.
I have asked him to see someone before ending our relashionship, I said "I know you love me and I do not think this is about us, I think your depressed and this won't go away on it's own. You owe me yourself and the children at least that much, to try after 3 1/2 years. If after seeing someone you still feel it's over okay, but I still want you as a frind." He promissed he would call someone Friday, but as of today he has not called me. Friday I emailed him a list of provides who specialized in depression and asked him to keep his promise. I just don't know how much to push or back off, I'm afraid if I let go too much I will lose him forever.