Many years ago I went through a terrible time. I got some help from a therapist. But what helped most was group therapy. I learned I wasn't the only one going through a very tough ordeal.
You're not alone. Others are going through tough times as well. I'm sure you're aware of that.
Back when I was having the most trouble in my life, I found that small steps in the right direction helped a lot. When I say small steps, I'm talking about just getting out of bed. Then when I was out of bed, I'd say, ok - now just take a shower. Don't think any further ahead than that. That's what I did.
Everytime I took a step, I was in a different position to move forward another step.
As far as the boyfriend is concerned, I learned that there really isn't just one person for everyone. There are many people. But you have to get moving to meet them.
I know you don't have any hobbies now. Were there some in the past?
Make a list of things you would like to have happen in your life. Whether an item is possible now or not, doesn't matter. When you find something you want, it's amazing how the universe brings things into your life. But you have to get moving for that to happen.
When thinking about things you want in your life, do not just think of big things. Small things count as well. Even something as small as say a piece of cake, a movie, etc.
Well, that's all for now. I wish you all the best. And as I said above, the key is to get moving... no matter how small the step.