This is actually an anxiety issue but left alone, my anxiety becomes so heavy it turns into a deep depression, plus I know you guys here alot better.
I am currently unmedicated, and have been using various methods to keep my anxiety at bay. One of these is 'keeping busy'. I am a stay at home mother of three children (4,2 and 1.5) Feeling increasingly anxious I decided to become a foster parent for 2 boys (3 and 2). A friend of mine begged me to start belly dancing with her, so I did. In February the boys went home. Feeling anxious I bought a Newfoundland puppy, signed up for french classes (2x per week), swimming classes with my children (2x per week) and two online courses in statistics and writing. Nine days the boys were returned to my care. I signed them up for swimming lessons too. So.... 2 children, a giant puppy, swimming lessons, belly dancing and 3 courses later... I'm starting to feel anxious.
I have established a routine where things run like clockwork and the challenge of 5 children under 4 is no longer there. I feel my anxiety start to grow and I'm getting nervous and a bit scared. The boys have a baby brother (about 6 months now) in another home and his foster parents are asking him to be transfered. My husband has been looking at new born babies in supermarkets and suggesting we have another. Percy my dog is lonely and barks if I leave him in the yard alone. There is an older Labrador retriever in the paper for free. French classes and belly dancing don't start again till September. I'm going crazy because I want to take this other foster child, have a baby and take another dog only to keep things busy and relieve my anxiety.
Where does it end?
(also be posted on the anxiety forum)
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