Dear Rainy, I can't find the right words to describe how I feel for you and your kids.
Words might give you some comfort at the dark og hopeless place, where you're at, but words can't change the situation for you and your kids, but action can. Rainy, you've got to leave him... not tomorrow, not a week from now or even a month... but NOW.
I know, it's not easy... I can imagine that it frightens you not knowing what the future brings, but leaving him is the ONLY way towards happier days.
You wrote that he wants you to be weak. But HE is the weak one. Only weak people are violent, and only insane people are capable of hurting kids.
Rainy, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your three kids. I hope you'll find the strenght leave him.