Thank for your help guys, it means a lot.
I had tried counseling, but that was to deal with my anger problems, and I didn't tell my counselor about
these thoughts. For a matter of fact, I decided not to go to my counseling sessions because I didn't see it helping (I have problems with speaking to a total stranger about
No Maree, I'm not on meds, nor have I spoke to my doctor. And I haven't been through this before.
I've had these thoughts since maybe I was around 7 years old, possibly younger! But not so frequent and not as bad as this. They were usually how the people died when I finished watching a horror movie. I don't remember my thoughts back then, but I do remember when I was 10, I was sitting in the passenger seat, and my stepfather was driving. I remember becoming all tense because the car in front of us had a boat on the back, and a large transport behind us, and I was afraid the boat would detach from the car, and out small blue car would hit it, and the transport would slam into us. Yes, it was strange, but i was only 10!
My father is a little (maybe more!) paranoid like I am. Whenever we are at his house, he would never trust us to
open the door, afraid someone would try and break in and kill us all. Which is why he kept a large knife beside as he played the computer. Perhaps I "inherited" it from him.
Thank you for replying again, and I'm glad I'm not the only one