I know exactly what you are dealing with. I have lived my life mostly with the face of "normalcy" and how found that although it made everyone around me comfortable, it made me comfortably numb!!!! In fact there are still very few people that I have taken this mask off for. Needless to say most of them were in my life for a short period of time and found that I could not offer them a 50/50 relationship because of my depression(male and female relationships) they did want to be part of my life. In time, it hardened me and actually made me realize that I could only be accepted when I was not a burden to anyone.
I know have a face of anger and numbness. I have lost some of the most valuable things to depression and depression related actions. I have decided to be what I am. However this person is a person that doesnt care if you want to be part of my life or not.
I did see that you have a relationship that you can be true to yourself and that he is accepting of this. First I want to say that I consider that is a devine gift from God because there are few good men out there that indeed look further into a person's soul than what she offers either mentally, physically or materially. I am one that in my opinion offers little or nothing to a man. Having said that, I want to say that having a person in your life that can look at your with pure unconditional love is worth more than gold. I had this and wish to offer you something. Remember that this person no matter how wonderful he is,,,,he is human and does have a breaking point. Sometimes we forget that although there is so much strength in that person's ability, that they are too flesh and blood. I will say that I admire that fact that you are in touch with your depression and are getting help that is the first and most important step!!!! Some people dont have that and depend solely on the person that is there for them. In cases such as yours and mine, I learned that taking care of the person that is taking care of you is so very important. If your guy is as supportive as he sounds, it will overshadow your ability to understand that if he gives you his all, he eventually has nothing. I implore you to allow him to be your rock but when you start seeing this rock starting to chip from wear and tear, it is important to know that depression is starting to take part of him as well. He will deny this up and down, trust me I know. I am not sure what the solution is to this because I tried to be strong and not let him carry the whole load and yet is still took a part of my guy that he will never have. I can say this, you knowing this, maybe your counselor could shed some light on what you could do when this happens.
Stay strong and know that prayers are being said for all of our "rocks" that have taken the high road in loving someone with depression.