The weather here was beautiful today. And as my depression is slowly lifting I'm running into problems that I haven't faced in a while. Compound that with the fact that my people skills just aren't what they used to be, since when I'm depressed I completely shut people out. And I mean that quite literally. There was a time when I don't think I had any personal interaction with another human being (beside at work and grunting the required responses to cashiers) for three months. So, my coping skills are what you could say "rusty". Now, I'm faced with all kinds of feelings and emotions that have been shut off for a while and I can't seem to figure what to say at the time I'm having them. Plus, I can't seem to get rid of this guy at work who "likes me". I mean I feel like I'm back in junior high again. We went out to lunch a few times, went on a hike once, and I cooked dinner for him, since he wouldn't let me pay for lunch. It was my way of saying thank you. We've never went on a "date". We actually discussed this fact, since he pointed out. Nothing has ever happened between us, and I mean NOTHING. No hand holding, no kissing, not even a hug. I clearly explained to him fromthe beginning that I did not have a romantic interest in him I was confused when he reacted by going out of his way to actively avoid me - it kinda through me, since I though he was overreacting. We talked a little bit about
this, but I left at "let's be cordial to each other, but I really cannot hang out with you anymore". He continued to actively avoid me, to the point where if I was walking down the hallway he would quickly turn around the other way to avoid me. It did not make any rational sense. I mean I really don't understand his reaction. And now, out of the blue, since he's been sulking and staring at the ground whenever I get near him, he waited just outside the door "to talk" to me. At that point he hands me a little black box. (Now, all you woman will understand my initial dread when I was presented a little black box, since a lot of us automatically jump to the conclusion that it's jewerly. And my very first reaction was it was a diamond ring.) It wasn't. It was a paperweight that he got from him "trip to Florida. I had no idea he took a trip to Florida and said so. He told him that it reminded him of me. Now, I haven't thought of this guy in months, so again i don't understand why he would still be thingking about
me. Oh, I already feel better since I got that all out of my system. I did place a phone call to our "Employee Assistance Program" which gives out advice on all kinds of matters and the counselor is suppose to call me back first thing in the morning. But, I guess I just needed to get it out of my system sooner rather than later. In the meantime, if anyone has any words of wisdom, advice, or suggestions they would be grealy appreciated. Thanks.