Yeah, I'm pretty sure she'd murder me in my sleep if I ever put her into a cold shower with her clothes on. On second thought, she probably wouldn't wait until I was asleep.
She had a WONDERFUL mother's day this year (just a few weeks ago). I let her sleep in (something she loves), made her favorite breakfast and delivered it with flowers and a balloon and the kids saying Happy Mother's Day! The kids and I gave her a bunch of gifts and then we went to a nice park to feed the ducks and geese. I then gave her a sizeable gift card to use at the mall and she just beamed and wanted to take off right away for the mall, so we did.
She shopped and found a place that was going out of business and had everything 70% off (she LOVES finding bargains). She ended up with something like 20 different items of clothing. Then I took her and the kids to lunch. We went home and she laid all of her new clothes out and was just loving all of the different options she had for the summer.
I made her a nice dinner and then made one of her favorite desserts. She turned to me at the end of the day and said, "This was a good day." That was HUGE considering how things had been going with her and us.
So, I do things for her and show her how much I love her ALL the time. She's actually asked me on many occasions NOT to be so romantic and thoughtful because she feels as if she has to match me. We've gone over that many times and she just has to realize that she doesn't have to match me. But that's another story and it's going to take a while.
She and I spoke this morning about
her working in the office and she basically said that she feels like she's been a disappointment to me and doesn't feel that she deserves the respect that I'm trying to give her by having her be involved in this process. I explained that while I'm not happy how things have gone, I'm more than willing to look past the past and move forward with no resentment, etc. She wants me to treat her like an employee and maybe it will change after that. Oooooookay. I don't think that I have any choice at this time based on the way she feels, etc.