I am starting to talk to a therapist but it is so hard to stick with them, because for me they are usually not such a big help.
Jenni I have been there. I'm not sure where you are/the availability of counselors, but if one counselor doesn't fit, then try another one. I've been to 6 counselors over the course of 42 years and of them all, 2 really helped me. One of the 2 I am seeing now and I never thought I would be able to tell another person (other than my husband) the things I've been able to share with her. And feel safe.
Your second post I could also relate to....why did this weird thing happen? It must have been my fault. It's taking me a lot to realize that not everything is my fault too. Of course we all make mistakes, but are blaming yourself for everything?
As I said I want to write more but this morning's counseling session was intense. However I am learning that it is okay to say "I am tired/stressed/overwhelmed but I care about
what is happening to you, I just can't give you much right now except my support." So please understand I want to give you more right now but I can't . But I hope to talk with you again.
“Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.” - Homer Simpson
“Good counsel failing men can give, why? He that's aground knows where the shoal doth lie” - Benjamin Franklin
“When we turn to one another for counsel we reduce the number of our enemies.” - Kahlil Gibran