Hello and welcome to Healing Well and the Depression forum. You will meet many kind and caring membrs here that know where your coming from and what your going through.
Your story resembles my own and I am a lot older than you but I had a major meltdown 2 years ago and I am still putting myself together.
I would agree with others here that setting a future goal to return to work is a good idea. As for the EX, deep six his email, he is not your best friend..........................no way. Block his emails. Just my 2 cents worth on that subject. :)
For now try setting tiny realistic everyday goals. I bought some plain spiral note books and the first thing each morning I would write down my goals..........I mean I was like you, I could not thinK of why I should even get up as my life felt like it was over.
My goals will sound silly to some but I made it work for me. I numbered them and started with 1. Get up and eat breakfast. 2. Wash Hair 3. Walk 5 mins on treadmill. etc. I gave myself permission to not beat myself up if I did not accomplish all my goals.
As I got better, I made my goals bigger and the day I got on a plane a year later all by myself to fly to Missouri to meet a friend I was so proud of how far I had come.
Yes, I have had set backs but I allow myself to cry when I need to, I am not perfect, I am a person that has depression. I did discover there is light at the end of the tunnel so keep taking babysteps toward that light.
Have you thought of doing an online course just for fun? Something entertaining and inexpensive.
Gentle Hugs to you