Hi, Everyone, I'm new on here, i usually post on the Ostomy forum but i have been reading some threads on here too. I will try and give you a brief history about myself, here goes - I had my second baby boy in feb 05 and it was a difficult birth with a 3rd degree tear. I had been going to my docs every month complaining that i had no control over my bowels eventually in the july he referred me to a colorectal surgeon, anyway he told me my anal sphincter had been snapped during the delivery. So he repaired this and performed a loop ileostomy "temporary" until it healed. W hich it has but i still have the ileostomy which gets me down most days and knocks my confidence greatly. I have not been back to work since having my baby because i developed a hernia on my stoma site too. Then in march this year my husband of 9 yrs "came out" and left me and my 2 boys who are now 5 and 2. I felt shocked, unable to believe the man i go to bed with every night was gay! Now i just feel empty and lonely. I feel as if he has died, but he hasnt he is living a life out there without me, it hurts sooo much. I can really only speak to close family about this as no one else knows, i just dont know where to turn.