Sue, I'm so glad you had a change of heart. Your family is important. You'll really realize that when they have passed on and they aren't there anymore. Your father is probably being influenced by your stepmother. You are right, she isn't worth breaking up the family over.
I think Karen is on to something. She probably is jealous of you. She knows your dad loves you very much and she wants to be the center of attention so she says hurtful things to make herself feel superior and you inferior! Don't fall for that! Don't sit in the house because you have extra pounds on your body. Learn to love yourself. Your body isn't "you"...it's just the way you travel around this earth! At one point, I weight 265 pounds! But, I knew I was a good person inside and so did my friends and my family...the family that loved me. My Mom, God love her, would say that I looked "heavy" in certain outfits, but she was telling me out of love and not hate. But it still hurt a lot. I did eventually lose the weight.
Please don't let fibromyalgia run your life and affect your relationships with family and friends. You need to be in control of it and not have it control you and what you do and how you relate to people. Sue, you will find a lot of people just don't understand. If you had something visable and terminal, people wouldn't treat you the way they do. But, since fibro is an invisible illness, they just don't understand. Don't try to explain it to them. Just do the best you can around them. They will see the pain, eventually. I know my family did. I didn't talk about fibro or how I felt, either. I just went for the visits and enjoyed the company.
Next time you visit your father, do just that! Visit with your father. You can be pleasant to your stepmother but you don't have to get in big conversations with her. I would make any conversation about fibromyalgia and how you feel totally off limits. She may "come around" some day but it isn't that important to her since you are not her child. Just shower your father with love since that's the real reason you go there to begin with.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7