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Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1303
   Posted 10/22/2008 12:36 PM (GMT -7)   
I figured I would provide an update. I havent been on much lately, I have been busy with school and stuff. goes.
I started taking Paxil 6 weeks ago. I felt better after just 2 weeks, but I feel even more better now. I get so excited over every little thing because it feels SO new to me now! I feel more like me, like I used to...(a long time ago!) I have had a few downs, Im having trouble (still) comming to terms with the fibro thing. Its harder now because since I do feel better, happy, I want to do more things, but have realized that I cant. I realized that even carrying certain things, playing outside, still hurts. One thing in particular:
Some of you know I love dirt-bikes! I would totally race if I had a good one to do so. But, I dont have one. My brother got one, and my neighbor, and so everyone around me has something to ride. So, Im feeling left out a bit. But, the thing is, I have such a burning passion for riding. I am in no way scared or anything. Im crazy actually! Haha, not to mention, I have more skill them all of them put together! tongue   But, the other day I realized that it feels like the only thing I have left. Like, I had to quit playing sports because it hurt to much, I had to quit skating, playing basketball, volleyball, or tennis. I do these things occasionally, but its not the same. Riding comes so much more easier for me. I can still go fast and fly through the air. I can have fun. And my fibro doesnt slow me down. So, I have been really bummed that I dont have anything to ride.
But, my bum-ness hasnt been to bad. The other day I wanted to be mad and depressed and it was like this huge shield in my head saying NO! You cant be down anymore! haha Im loving it. I went to a party last weekend, and then spent the night at my brothers. I rarely spend the night with people. I get nervous and stuff. And I rarely go out, but I did. And I made plans for this weekend, something I havent ever really done before. I feel really good about doing things. And I feel more confident in myself. I get upset or sad about things, but its more normal like everyone has every now and then, ya know! So, Im so SO glad and I am praying that it lasts this time. I havent felt this good in such a VERY long time. Im bouncing off of walls again, being funny, being ME. I feel like I fell in a hole and landed on a rollercoaster a year and a half ago, but now I feel like the ride is over and I am stepping off a new person with a different view of things.
Wow, I just realized how this sounds, so corny! But hey, I cant help it! Well...I also kind of have a crush now also so... I have done a lot of searching for myself and even though I know this wont last, its been a long time since I had a crush on someone. blush
Anyways, just thought I owed you all an update. Wanted to let ya know I hadnt disappeared off of Earth! smilewinkgrin   Take care!

"Healing is an energy phenomenon. Hope is another word for Healing.
"Cracks in the concrete are just reminders that you fall apart no matter how strong you are"
"Sometimes it is best to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve"
"Im going to smile like nothing is wrong, talk like everything is perfect, act like its all a dream, and pretend its not hurting me."

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17528
   Posted 10/22/2008 1:24 PM (GMT -7)   
Tennis, this is great news!  Thank you for telling us!  My daughter is on Paxil and really likes it.  She tried several other meds and they didn't work for her either.  But the Paxil has made a big difference for her.
You will get your dirt bike sometime. Just be patient and start saving money when you start working.  Sometimes we have to wait awhile for the good stuff but that makes you appreciate it much more.  You REALLY appreciate it if you have had to work for it so you will take great care of it, too.  So, have patience.  I know you will be flying through the air sometime in the future!  yeah
I'm glad you are getting out and doing things with friends again.  You have made some huge changes since I first met you...about a year ago.  You should be very, very proud of yourself.  I know I'm proud of you.  It was a tough row to hoe but you did it!  Give yourself a huge pat on the back for me.
Continue to let us know how you are and what you are doing.  I know I'm very interested...especially with your "crush."  I'm so happy for you.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

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