My Christmas is over and all I got from Santa was another cracked rib.

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   Posted 12/22/2008 12:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Okay, as many of you know I had Christmas for my ungrateful family over the weekend. Fiday night before bedtime I got on the floor to drag out comforters (in space saver bags that never seem to stay deflated) under the beds in the guest room. There was one I couldn't reach and instead of being smart enough to go to the other side of the bed I reached too far and my ribs were against my knee and one popped, again. My middle son and DIL was in the room but I don't think they believed I could crack a rib that easily. My son did offer to help me up after I caught my breath. I knew him pulling on my arms was going to make the pain worse so I rolled over and got myself up. I did tell DH when I got to our room what I had done but there was no mention of it the rest of the weekend. So without being able to sleep comfortably on my left side which is the side I have to sleep on and the pain from the rib my weekend didn't go too well.
Saturday I was ready to lose it and go to bed for the rest of the day. Trying to keep everyone here at the same time for Santa to come seemed impossible and it ended up being 5 before they were all together. By that time I was tired and I hurt and got no joy out of the whole thing. I did not feel up to picking up after the kids and was trying to keep Krissy from getting hold of something that might hurt her while everyone else was ignoring their undisciplined children.
Everyone left yesterday without picking up the first thing except their gifts they took with them, there was dog hair all over every piece of furniture in the house from the granddog. I do not know how a 40 lb dog can shed sooo much. DH and I decided today while trying to clean up some of the hair, that hurt feelings or not, the dog is not welcome again. If we wanted to put up with dog hair we would not have a dog that does not shed.
Yes, I do feel like a grinch today. I try to give my grandchildren a great Christmas every year and I know the pain has a lot to do with the way I feel today but I don't remember hearing one thank you from anyone all weekend. They are all a bunch of spoiled brats big and little. Next year it is time to have this at someone's house besides mine or Santa will not come. There are plenty of children out there that would appreciate the gifts so much more than these children that have it all.
Grandma and Grandpa are both wore out and tired today. I had to get this out or it was going to drive me crazier even if no one reads it.
luv and hugs
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   Posted 12/22/2008 12:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh Marlee,

You must be in so much pain. I am so sorry that this has happened to you. I know that you put a lot of effort into the holidays and to crack a rib, that is just horrible. I hope that you are feeling a little better now. I know that it takes ribs a long time to heal and there is nothing that you can do to help the process.

We had our Christmas on Saturday too. It was really nice and the kids loved their presents.

I hope that your day gets better. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Luv and hugs, Karen
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   Posted 12/22/2008 12:59 PM (GMT -7)   
Marlee, I'm soooo sorry you had such a horrible time.  I have some family members that are ungrateful, too, so you definitely are not alone.  This same family wanted to bring their dog to my home, too.  I told them they could not and they were not pleased.  Oh, well....  I'm sure they wouldn't be too happy if I brought my dog and two cats to their home. 
Marlee, are you taking calcium?  This sure sounds like osteoporosis to me.  You shouldn't be able to break bones like that so easily.  I have an acquaintance who traveled with our group.  She started breaking bones easily and didn't do anything about them.  She is a lot older that you are.  (I bet you never thought you'd hear those words come out of my mouth!  devil )  Anyway, she is in a nursing home now because of osteoporosis.  So, please check with your doctor and do what you need to to protect your bones.
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   Posted 12/22/2008 1:03 PM (GMT -7)   
Marlee, I can really sympathize with you.  I don't have a cracked rib, but my Christmas with the family is yet to come and I'm dreading it so much that it takes all the fun out of it. 
Our children and grandchildren have so much that they don't appreciate anything that you give them.  We've started giving the adult children money and they all make more than me and dh. so it doesn't even please them.  The young ones have so much bought for them throughout the year that nothing is left to buy them at Christmas.  It is really a shame how they all act. 

I will be so glad when it's over.  We do all of ours on Christmas Eve so the kids can have their own Christmas on Christmas morning. 
Somewhere along the line they have forgotten the true meaning of Christmas.  I can't keep from thinking of all the homeless ppl that would give their eye teeth to have a small percentage of what my family spends for Christmas. 
I am ashamed of the way they act and I sure didn't raise them that way.  I'm also on pins and needles waiting for one or the other starting some big argument my dh included.  They seem to bring out the worst of him.
I just wish mine was already over with.  Isn't that sad?  I can't even enjoy my Christmas break from school worrying about what will happen Christmas Eve.
All I can say is Merry Christmas and enjoy the rest of the holiday.
God Bless!
Of all the things that I have lost, I miss my mind the most!!!!

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   Posted 12/22/2008 1:33 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm so sorry for your bad weekend!

If Santa does decide not to come next year, you could always ship those gifts on over here! I'll say thank you for sure! lol
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!!! At my wit's end with being "broken" !!!

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   Posted 12/22/2008 1:52 PM (GMT -7)   

Oh Marlee...I am so sorry about your rib (even more sorry that you didn't break it in a much more enjoyable fashion...tee hee) and know exactly what you mean about what Christmas has become in this day and age.  I was happy my one son asked us not to spend more then ten dollars apiece on the girls this year.  I mean, how many portable dvd  players and v-techs does a child need?  We sent gift certificates for Barnes and Noble to my husbands grandchildren because they have so much nothing is appreciated or even makes an impression.  When they called on Christmas last year, they had to ask their mother what we gave them.

I am sorry to say that I have one DIL that thinks when she comes here to visit she is on vacation and doesn't even pick up a dish.  That is really getting old...just like me.  I would like to say something to my son, who was NEVER raised to go into someone's home and not pick up after himself, but don't want to start anything I'll regret.

Well...hope you are feeling better.  No more cracked ribs and that's an order!




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   Posted 12/22/2008 1:55 PM (GMT -7)   
Marlee, sorry to hear about your misfortune. . . ouch. . . My costo was brought on by things like that so I'm really feeling for you. Hopefully your meds will kick in and you start feeling a bit better.

You take care and be sure to rest! It's the holidays and you deserve it :)
Much Love, Hugs, Peace and Comfort!!!
Your Bro,
 "We either make ourselves happy or miserable.   The amount of work is the same”
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   Posted 12/22/2008 2:10 PM (GMT -7)   

I am so sorry that you broke your rib while trying to have a fun family event. In my humble opinion, next year,you and hubby can go on a cruise during the holiday. I know it sounds cold but I feel your family needs to miss you during the holidays.

I know that after you do this they will break their backs trying to persuade you to have more family occasions. In addition, they might just offer to help.

I think that unless we spell out the boundaries clearly, people will take advantage of us. Moreover, we live in a country where greed is considered okay. It is very hard to keep families together. There is very little support for close communities in our make money fast world (well if we can make money nowadays).

Please take care of yourself. I have lowered my expectations for the holidays because I cannot even decorate a big tree. Besides our cat is a Bengal and he would love to tear it down as I hung ornaments.

When your children and grads see you being gently with yourself they will have to change. It will not be easy. Some may raise Cain over the issue. lol But stick to your guns, your health and sanity comes first.


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   Posted 12/22/2008 2:48 PM (GMT -7)   
Marlee, I am so sorry about you pain, both physical & emotional.  I can't even imagine the pain you were in for the weekend.  You should have been put in a comfy chair & pampered for the rest of the week end.  I had all my kids & grandkids home for a week a few years ago & I was just wiped out because of course, I did all the cooking & cleaning & planning for day trips, which I also packed for.  My husband helped as much as he could.  So after they left, Mike & I agreed, they would never all be here at the same time again.  If they do plan to be, they will each receive a chore list on arriving.   smilewinkgrin So, go take a long warm bath with some candles & a good book.  Please take care of yourself.   Love & hugs, Denise

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   Posted 12/22/2008 3:51 PM (GMT -7)   

Awww ((((((((((Marlee))))))))))  for the rest of this should be about You & Ken.  You did your duty, and I know that sounds harsh, but seeing as they just treated your home like "The Holiday Inn" duty seemed fit to me anyway.

Spoil each other...Take a long soak together...or give each other massages...whatever you chose, just be together and enjoy the rest of the holiday.  I am so sorry you cracked a rib!!!!  Do they not know anything about OA?????  Sheesh...I dont know much about it...but I DO know about how little it takes to crack a bone...they have commercials for it here tongue    A delicate china tea cup that cracks after someone pouring hot tea into it.  I have "the crowd" to deal with Christmas Eve, and I hope and pray that they show me some consideration.  My sons are good, but their SO's seem to think that dinner at my house means...being waited on....and that is MY fault...I will make sure that I get help even if I have to ask for it.


Gentle hugs, and I hope you get your rib tended too ASAP


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   Posted 12/22/2008 5:19 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm so sorry to hear about your weekend, both about your poor body and what you had to deal with w/ your family! I cannot believe you did all of those things with a cracked rib.  Wow, are you tough!  shocked



"Tragedy is a tool for the living to gain wisdom, not a guide by which to live."
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   Posted 12/22/2008 5:32 PM (GMT -7)   

i am so very sorry that your family was so self centered :( and i'm so sorry to hear about your rib! like diane said, i agree that you definitely need to pamper yourself for putting up with all of that!

i hope you get better soon

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   Posted 12/22/2008 5:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Let me at them Marlee. I will tell them how ungrateful they were. I would give anything to spend another Christmas with my Grandma, but I cant.... I would be 100% grateful and I would defn. say thank you and give her a BIG hug and kiss like I were never going to let her go! Not to mention, I never would have left without helping clean up. I would have left the house the way it was when I arrived.

Im really sorry you spent the weekend in so much pain and that you were treated the way you were. I only wish my Grandma was here for Christmas. I think of her constantly. And on Christmas and Thanksgiving I sit at the table in the place were she always sat, we ALWAYS sat next to each other, so I sit in her seat to signify that no one else can have her! I always remember her.

Speaking of which. I must tell of what happened to me earlier. I took my puppy out in the freezing cold for a walk. There was a BEAUTIFUL sunset and one big star in the sky. I was warm tho, regardless of the cold. I felt so free..It was........amazingly different! I loved it tho, I felt like spinning in circles and sending thanks toward the sky while smiling my BIG happy smile(btw, I actually did all of that!) haha, it was so strange tho. I just felt.......

Free. Thats the only word I can think that REALLY describes how I felt. Like I had no worries. Like, I had no pain. Like, finally life slowed down and let me catch up to it.... I felt, relieved. The world felt lifted from my shoulders... Even for a bit, this feeling was AMAZING.

This holiday season just makes me SMILE. I was born smiling and everyone always notices and even my first grade teacher still tells me that she has never forgotten how I always smiled! lol It makes me feel so good..

Okay, now that I have gone on, I actually meant to say how when I looked at the beautifully crafted sunset and that big star I felt my Grandma. She was with me. Like her hand on my shoulder and me smiling into her eyes kind of thing. That free-ness was her there with me! =]

Okay, I promise to quit writing, Im headed to a Christmas party all my closest friends are having! Thankss!!
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   Posted 12/22/2008 6:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Christi you brought tears to my eyes talking about your grandmother.
My future DIL did call a little while ago to ask how I was feeling and to tell me how much those 4 grandchildren were enjoying the toys I got them. She is not the problem in the family. It's the DIL that stays here and does act like she is on vacation at the Holiday Inn. My son was not raised that way but he sure seems to have picked up a lot of her habits over the years. They are the owners of the dog also.
The 21 yr old grandson had to sleep in the family room with the 12 and 9 1/2 yr old grandsons cause the 12 yr old was being so mean to his cousin. I did not know this til after everyone but the 21 yr old had left. Twelve year old is very much like his mother. It really is very sad and makes me want to cry that some of my grandchildren are being raised with so little regard for others.
I am glad it is over and I can relax now. Don't think I will be snuggling with Ken this week. All my muscles are really sore on the left side of my ribs now and tight, worse than they were over the weekend.  I have plenty of lidoderm patches. I can tell right where it is cracked.
Sherrine I do have osteoporosis. But every since Ken broke my ribs they rebreak so easy. I can't take any of the oral meds for osteoporosis but I need to have the once a year IV.
Next year I think we will spend a day at a homeless shelter and they will all give a gift to a child that will really appreciate it.
I'm sorry some of you have families much like mine but it does make me feel better. I hope all goes well for those that have yet to celebrate with your families.
Thanks for making me feel better, I can always count on my Fingertip family.
We have more bad weather coming the next two days here.
luv and hugs
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   Posted 12/22/2008 7:16 PM (GMT -7)   
Marlee, I have had cracked ribs before. You must be in terrible pain. Do you have a brace or something to stabilize the cracked rib until it heals again? Do you go to the doc for it, or does it happen so often that you already know what to do?
Wish you a quick recovery,

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   Posted 12/22/2008 8:04 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh Marlee, I'm so, so sorry about all that happened. I know you worked so hard to get your home in shape, and you were so looking forward to this visit with your family. I've had times too, when I've really looked forward to an event with my family, and the kids would misbehave. Or things didn't go as I had pictured. It really brings you down when the reality isn't as good as the anticipation. I'm so sorry that your family let you down. Then you breaking a rib on top of that!

You should try not to think about the visit anymore, and take the rest of the time to enjoy with Ken. I hope that you have a restful, peaceful holiday!

I should add, we are guilty of spoiling the kids. We try to teach them right, and each year we say we won't spoil them anymore. But I love making them happy... this year is no exception. I guess I'll just have to cross my fingers and have faith that they will turn out all right.

Have a Merry Christmas, Marlee.
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   Posted 12/22/2008 8:13 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm so sorry to hear about your weekend! My mom and I were just talking about how we get walked over by everyone in the family. She's practically taking care of her brother's kids. I have four cousins from Minnesota who spend their time here running around our house screaming and pinning each other down and punching. They are little monsters. My aunt ignores them, so my mom just takes it upon herself to discipline them. You should try that sometime. :-)

I hope you feel better and have a wonderful holiday now that the worst is over.
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   Posted 12/22/2008 10:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Marlee...I do love you!

I can relate to your feelings but in a bit of a different way. It not only hurts your body to try and keep going but the pain in your heart is even greater when members of the family are ingrates! In my case my own daughter can be the snotty one and my 'extra' daughter is the sweetheart. But, for the most part they are very good when they come over. They get along well and do pick up before leaving.

Maybe it's time to change your tradition?!? I have and ya know, it wasn't painful at all. We're so downsized this year but we're most likely down to a very reasonable amount. Probably downsize more next year. I go for things that are interesting, fun, but the kids get something out of it. I hate plastic and batteries! Go drastic next year and you and hubby call the shots. Go away for the holiday, someone else can host it, only 1 gift per child and no more than 20 bucks! This year the adults are not even doing a name draw/exchange. Only a white elephant gift and that's no cost (if done right) and fun. Focus on the party and not the 'things'. I'm heading that way fast!

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   Posted 12/23/2008 7:09 AM (GMT -7)   


And I thought "I" was a bad girl getting a "root canal" for Christmas!  devil   Ouch- that had to hurt!

Sorry to hear that the "fam" was unappreciative. sad Sure can make for a miserable weekend like you said. I have had many, many Christmases at my house and I understand the work involved! I have been very HAPPY to past the torch onto the grown son, and niece's. They all have homes now. It is so dang funny to watch them as they host/hostess for the first time. They are exhausted by the end (and they are young!) and then they realize how much work goes into having it at their homes.

And we ALL work together- no one lets anyone have the whole burden. We take turns holding the youngest babies, picking up, help with the table set up etc., etc. I even took my niece's dog out to go potty because her and her husband were so busy. Speaking of dogs, I also can relate about the shedding! The granddog is a huge yellow lab and he sheds year round and horribly! It can take me days to get his hair out of here after he goes home when I have had him for any length of time. My son and daughter-in-law do not take him to occasions because of this! The only reason I take him and am willing to go through what I do is because I love him dearly. Just say it's a "labor of love."

I hope your doing a little better today- I don't know about you, but I am still tired from last weekend!





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   Posted 12/23/2008 11:54 AM (GMT -7)   
Guess I shouldn't have smarted off about you getting a root canal for Christmas GamJill, guess Santa was reading the post. turn
I don't go to the ER anymore when I break a rib cause all they do is what I do at home and put a lidoderm patch on it. They do not bind your ribs anymore cause so many people get pneumonia from it. Inspite of the pain I make myself take deep breaths and cough if I need to. The last thing I need is pneumonia.
I'm over the ungrateful ones and hope I live to see their sons growup and get married and act at their house like they act at mine. I'm sure they will be worse. Revenge is sweet. devil
You love, nuture and teach your children right from wrong and what they do with it when they are grown is up to them.
We have had snow and now sleet today and I am going to venture out to get the sweetest card I can find for Ken and a box of candy or something. He went to the grocery store and is now in the kitchen making a big pot of beef stew.
By the way the Rice Krispie treats we made didn't even turn out right. I was measuring the marshmallows and he was measuring the Rice Krispies and I either didn't put enough marshmallows in or he put too much Rice Krispies in cause they were very dry. That's pretty sad when you mess up Rice Krispie treats.
luv and hugs
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   Posted 12/23/2008 12:15 PM (GMT -7)   
I am so sorry you had such a rough time and are feeling un appreciated. It is tough when you go to some ones house or when you have someone at your own house My parents live in tennessee I live In Pa, When we go to my moms we always take the dog she is only four pounds however before we leave the beds get striped and sheets in wash. I vaccum every room in the house and The kitchen gets thouroly cleaned Now mind you I clean houses so I have cleaning down to just about record time. I could not imagine leaving my Mom with such a mess. My kids go to my parents for 3-4 weeks in the summer and I give them chores to do every day they have to vac dust clean bathrooms, the kitchen ther own laundry ect.. As soon as my kids receive a gift from any one they need are to say thank you even if it is something they do not like or already have, I have taught my children that a gift is because a person thinks of you in a good manner and any gift big or small is full of the same.
Growing up we each received 3 gifts and that was it there were three wise men and they each brought baby jesus a gift. My friend has 6 young children and After she heard my story of the 3 gifts that is all santa brings to her children. growing up poor I do give my children more but They do appreciate it. I hope that you can find a way to make it through and not hurt yourself any more.. You need to let your son know that you are no spring chicken and if you are all to be togather they are all expected to share in the work.

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   Posted 12/23/2008 1:56 PM (GMT -7)   
so sorry to hear about your ribs. It is soooooooo painful. I have broken two ribs just by reaching into the car the wrong way. I too, have osteoporosis, and its not fun. I sure hope you and Ken can get some much needed rest. Just take it easy and enjoy the rest of the holidays.

Big Gentle Hug

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   Posted 12/24/2008 8:43 AM (GMT -7)   

Marlee!  I'm so sorry that you hurt yourself! sad    I'm also sorry that you're family is ungrateful (I'm beginning to wonder if that's a fibro thing wink ).  I hate it when people just let their kids run wild like that.  My parents weren't strict at all, but all it took was "the look" from them, and we knew that it was time to shut up and stop whatever we were doing.  It drives me crazy when parents just let their kids go running through Wal-Mart, screaming and crying for a Wii or throwing a tantrum because they can't get some other expensive thing.  And the parents just act oblivious to it! mad

Anyway, I've gotten off the point of you and your pain. sad   My friend has pneumonia and she dislocated her rib and she says it's worse than childbirth (of course, she had an epidural and a c-section, LOL).  I hope you have some pain meds to make you feel better.  I'll keep you in my thoughts.  BTW-thank you for thinking of my Grandma Toots.  I don't know if y'all know just how much I appreciate it.

As soon as you feel better, please let me know how I can help with your geneaology.  There's a rumor (but it's probably a trick wink ) that I may be getting my own apartment in a month or so. shocked

Merry Christmas! :-)

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Post Edited (kelly71) : 12/24/2008 6:19:27 PM (GMT-7)

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   Posted 12/24/2008 9:33 AM (GMT -7)   
Oh Kelly I so hope it's not a rumor. They could have all pitched in and got you an apartment for Christmas. turn Thanks, I have got to get my computer cleaned out before I start on genealogy, I haven't cleaned it out for 2 yrs and I'm pretty much out of virtual memory.
Tell your friend that is not giving birth when you have an epidural and c-section.
Lee Ann if I only had DILs like you. smilewinkgrin My niece whom I love like a daughter is the one that would do all that before leaving. She comes and cleans my house every so often just cause she loves me.
Tootie, do you take meds for osteoporosis??? I'm going to ask the doc about the IV treatment you get once a year. I can see why my son and DIL didn't take me serious about breaking a rib that easy.
I'm sure I did too much yesterday and had to get up early this morning cause I was in so much pain even with the lidoderm patch on. It's actually worse instead of better but all the muscles are also sore on my left side so it's causing the costo or fibro to flare on that side. If I could sit here on the couch and not move, breathe, cough or talk it would be okay.
Thanks everyone.
luv and hugs
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
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Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 906
   Posted 12/24/2008 10:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Marlee, I'm sorry about your ribs. And your Christmas. Have you tried your tens unit on your ribs? Is that a possibility? Get better soon. Diane
Fibromyalgia since 1984, Sjogren's, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, Auto-immune eczema, GERD, osteoarthritis, IBS, RLS, sleep apnea

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