Can this really be so painful?

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New Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 1/2/2009 11:34 PM (GMT -7)   
I am a new member looking to see what others with Fibro do to survive. I have had this awful sickness for almost 3 yrs. I am still so confused as to what it is that caused it or what is the root of what I really have.  To give you the readers digest version:  I feel down the bottom 4 staris in my home and hurt my hip and back.  A month later I went through a nasty divorce just before I was to adopt my husbands 4 yr old child that he fathered with my neice.  He decided he wanted to be single again so istead of keeping me as her Mommy, he decided to allow the Nanny to move in and give him back his freedom.  I haven't seen her in 3 yrs and I think abt her every day.  He told her I went on a business trip.  I have depression, fibromyalgia, RLS, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, hip and back pain, sciatica, headaches, among a few other stuff.  There are many many days I can't even get out of bed to get water to take my meds.  I live alone, and can't work.  I filed for Disability almost 2 yrs ago.  A yr ago I had hip surgery quickly followed by a stroke which left me a terrible stuttering voice.  I have had several falls and had to stay with my brother due to not able to care for my self.  I feel like I am falling totally apart.  I have always been the one to do for others, and not even handleing having to depend on other to help ME? I take Lortab to barely take the edge of the pain away.  I also take Lyrica and Cymbalta.  Taking all this I rarely am able to even drive for the safety of others.  Of course there are the ocasional good days, but 95% are terrible.  Three yrs of hell!  I am 50 and can't even imagine living like this another yr.  I have shooting pains in my feet and ankles, also on the back side of one thigh.  I can't sit in a chair very long, so I lay flat in bed. At nite the calf pain and other nerve pain brings me to tears.  Any normal person would think I am a total Hypacondriac (spelling wrong) Before all this I was a pretty healthy person with only bad knees.  Now I find myself praying to just die.  I know there are people out there so much worse off than me with dying diseases.  I'd rather have one of those than to deal with constant pain every single day of my life for many hrs a day.  I don;t even know what I am asking...... just want to know what other Fibros are going through? Miserable in Oklahoma,

Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 257
   Posted 1/2/2009 11:46 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm sorry for all that you have gone through, physically and emotionally. You are in a good place here - the internet, I mean. It has been a lifesaving tool for me this fall, through a terrible flare that has rendered me unable to work. You are not alone. I am a Christian, and I believe that since God has not taken you home yet, you have a purpose - a reason to be here. It might not be obvious to you right now. But, you serve a purpose in the scheme of things, even with all you are dealing with. Perhaps you can change your prayers a bit, and ask Him to reveal to you the purpose of your pain, and/or to help you find His kingdom good in it.

I am surviving at 46 by learning to accept my new life and understand that it doesn't matter how I got here, "here" is where I'm at, and I need to learn to manage my fibro so it doesn't control me.

You are still beautiful "you" underneath and behind all the pain and meds.

If nothing else, keep typing. It will help you to find others who understand and can offer support. Who knows, maybe you will help someone else by sharing your experiences...?

Bless you,
Still learning how to manage my Fibromylagia, and all the lovely gifts it brings.   
I had severe spinal stenosis, had fusion done on C5-7, and my life has changed. 

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 519
   Posted 1/3/2009 12:54 AM (GMT -7)   

I am so sorry that you are hurting so much. That is the bad thing about Fibro....the pain is in different parts of our bodies and sometimes, during flares everything is worse. Do you think your doctor could give you something stronger for pain? I would call & let them know how much pain you are in.

There is also a good thread 2nd one down, called Fibro 101 that would be good for you to read. There are alot of different things to try for pain. I use the stretching excercises during the day, when I am not in too much pain. I also use a heating pad, hot shower, or a warm bath in epsom salts. Another thing that sometimes helps is just to relax, although that is harder to do when you are hurting too bad.

I hope you are able to find relief soon. Please keep us posted and try your doctor. He should know how bad your pain is getting and at least maybe give you something stronger to help with your pain.

Good luck!    Margie

Never regret something that made you smile!

Fibromyalgia*Osteoarthritis*Sleep Apnea*Restless Leg Syndrome * Depression*Fatigue*Allergy/Sinus*Menopause

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17501
   Posted 1/3/2009 1:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi, ibLorna, and welcome!  I'm so sorry that you are having so many problems.  You sure have been through a lot.  The stress of only one or two things can bring on the pain big time!  But we are here to help you.
I see that Margie directed you to the Fibro 101 thread...the second thread on the forum.  There are links there with good information about fibromyalgia that might help you.  There are some good stretching exercises there that might help you, too.  You do need to keep moving with fibro.  If you sit or lay too long, you will be stiff as a board and have more pain.  Walking is a good exercise and it doesn't cost a thing!
Moist heat helps many here.  A hot shower can feel so good and some here use a Bed Buddy.  You can make one yourself.  Just take a tube sock, fill it 2/3's full of raw long grained rice and tie a knot on the end.  This can be put in the microwave to heat up and it gives off moist heat.  (Do not wet it.  The moisture is in the dry rice!)  This feels good on those achy muscles, too.
In the Fibro 101 thread there is a link to malic acid/magnesium supplements.  These help some members, including me, with pain and fatigue.  Read about them and see what you think.  I also use ibuprofen (with food) and Tylenol for pain.  Be sure to talk to your doctor before you try anything.  I'm just giving out suggestions here.
I'm so glad you found us!  You have come to a great place because we have wonderful people here that have good ideas to help you live a full and enjoyable life.  The bonus is that we really do care about each other, too!  So jump right in with questions, read back posts too.  Before you know it, you will be feeling better and not so alone anymore!  Hope to hear more from you soon.
Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 1/3/2009 10:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lorna and welcome to the family. You have been through a lot of stressors and stress + fibro = pain. We don't know what causes fibro but many of us did get it after a stressful event either physical or mental.
You have been given some great advice on how we cope with fibro. You really do have to keep moving as hard as that may sound to you right now. I was in a very bad place when I joined this forum and thought they were crazy when they said you have to keep moving but I listened to them and they were right and I slowly started feeling better mentally and physically. Now no matter how bad the day I move as much as I can. It helps that I have a four month old puppy right now that keeps me moving.
I know your dealing with other physical problems right now that doesn't help any so I hope they heal soon and all your left with is fibro to contend with.
luv and hugs
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 41
   Posted 1/3/2009 11:08 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lorna,
I am a new member here, but not with pain and fatigue and stress. You certainly have a lot going on right now, which does nothing good for the Fibromyalgia pain. You also have CFS and many other diseases that feed off of the stress of the body.
I know things will get better for you, because that is the way life works. My best advice would be to treat yourself well. Take all of the measures to lessen the pain and fatigue. Many people say to fight through the fatigue, but I myself have never been able to do it. I sleep when I need to sleep and try to avoid things that set me off.
Hopefully, in a week or so, you feel well enough to tackle one thing at a time. Try to recognize those things in your life that you have no control over and give it over to God, or some higher power. Then look at what is within your control, and decide which ones deserve attention and assign it a timeframe to resolve. You might find that after your timeframe has expired, that it truly was not that important after all. I only give these suggestions to you because it is exactly what I have to do. I suffer from bi-polar disorder as well, and have had to learn coping skills. And it sounds like you need some coping skills right now.
I wish you all the best, and hope to hear you are doing better in the near future.
God Bless,

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 174
   Posted 1/3/2009 11:36 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Lorna and welcome.Its no wonder you hurt so bad with all that stress.I'm also a new member,and the folks here are as solid as oak trees for support and a kind word.Just knowing that another person is dealing with the same issues(more or less) that you are,make you feel less like the only sparrow in a hurricane.Currently sitting here munching on a cheeseburger with my middle finger in an upright position at my heart disease,because I woke up with crippleing muscle spasms and no pain meds and cheeseburgers make me feel better.(I can hear my arteries clogging as we speak)You have to make yourself number one in your life,no matter what,and the people who have trodden on your heart and health will someday either realize what they have done and make ammends or Karma has a funny way of making things right.In the meantime,take hot baths with your favorite oils and bubbles(bubbles are always good),put on your favorite music and turn it up loud as you can stand it!Sing can put your brain somewhere else for a little while.If all else fails,every once in a while,I'll get a couple of old plates and smash them to smithereens,I know it sounds crazy,but something about that sound makes me feel better.hang in there,we 're with you!                                                                 
fibro,heart disease,diabetes....God help! turn

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 1279
   Posted 1/3/2009 2:07 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Lorna and Welcome!

My heart goes out to you and everything you are dealing with. It sounds like your pain is not being controlled, 95 percent of the time is too much to be dealing with on a day to day basis- severe pain can wear you down no matter how positive a person you are. Do you have a good Dr. and does he/she know that you are in this much pain and this depressed? Med changes possibly? You are not functioning, and there is nothing worse!

Having a support group is a tremendous help also, and you have come to the right place-

Nice to have met you, and keep posting, vent, vent, vent if need be, we will be here for you.





Fibromyalgia, Depression, Anxiety, TMJ, Arthritis/neck, SAD
Zoloft, Tylenol 4000 mg., Darvocet  

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 41845
   Posted 1/3/2009 3:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lorna,

Welcome to the fibromyalgia forum. I am so happy that you have joined us.

You sure have had a lot on your plate. I am sorry for all the pain that you are going through.

I, like many others, take the malic acid/magnesium supplements and have noticed that I feel a lot better. I also take pain meds, muscle relaxers, adderall and antidepressants for fibromyalgia. I couldn't live without the medication and the supplements.

Vitamin D is very important also is calcium. Fish oil helps a lot too. So there are many alternatives for you out there. I hope that you can find something that will help you.

Keep posting, we are all here for you.

Have a painfree day,

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 368
   Posted 1/3/2009 9:14 PM (GMT -7)   

When I was at rock bottom every night I prayed I would die in my sleep as I couldnt deal with it and I was concerened at what I would do to myself. It took a long time but finally I got a doc who at least beleives although still has no idea of how severe the pain can be, at the same time I saw my second pain spec and he took me on. He put me a narcotoic patch and the pain eased the two thirds so between that and my doc meds I can function again.  In Australia we have services that are almost free, people to take you if you cant drive ect.  You need a doc and a pain spec.  A rheumy wont give the meds although they do help alot of people but to me they just said excersize, hah.  I also have arhtritis and the pain spec treats that as well.  You need to somehow find the strength to try these avenues and it can take several times.If I hadnt recevied the help I shudder to think what would of happened to me.

all the best and feel free to contact me anytime         sue2z sad sad

Fibromyalgia, ulcerative colonitus, arthritus, bi-polar
norspan patch, valium, prothiedon, lyrica

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 176
   Posted 1/4/2009 3:44 PM (GMT -7)   
And I am SO sorry for everything you are going through... life is so hard sometimes and it feels like it will not let up, even I know that and I am young...
I have been going through a flare up now for a week or so... I am in miserable pain, and I wish I could tell you what I do to survive but, I still don't even know myself how I am... I just hang in there day by day and hope that tomorrow will be better.. I guess that hope is what is getting me through
I'm so glad you have joined us! TAKE CARE!!
Fibromyalgia, Bipolar Disorder, Hallucinations, OCD, Chemical/Noise/Light Sensitivity, Irrational fears
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