Watching my wife live with fibro

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New Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 3/27/2009 6:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi I'm new to the forum thing. I don't know if I should be in this forum. My wife has had fibro since 2000. It hit her so hard that it even effected her diaphram. She was in intensive care for a while and barely breathing. She is the mother of 3 great kids, and watching her beg to die was horrible. This condition doesn't just effect one person, it also effects everyone that loves them

Regular Member

Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 223
   Posted 3/27/2009 7:00 AM (GMT -7)   
You are more than welcome here. This is a support group not only for those with Fibro, but their families as well. So welcome to our little group. I know it is really hard to watch her suffer. My husband has a hard time watching me suffer on my really bad days. It's not easy. And you are right. This illness does not just affect those with it, but it affects their family as well. Hang in there. You are more than welcome to post any time.
~MDD, Fibromyalgia, OCD, Anxiety Disorders, IBS, TMJ, Arthritis~
May your heart be filled with love and joy.
May your mind be clear and true.
May your smiles be many,
And may your tears be few. 
May God wrap you in His arms
Especially when you're feeling blue.

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 478
   Posted 3/27/2009 7:12 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi and Welcome,

I think it is awesome that you are reaching out for support to help you cope and hopefully learn things to help your wife!!! More "others" should do that.

How is your wife now? Is she able to join the forum. I tell you the support here is phenomenal and I think the world of these people. If you had asked me a year or two ago if I would ever join a support forum I would have said "never". I was narrow minded and have really learned so much. I suffer on a daily basis as many do but just hope I can offer some little help to someone suffering even more. This is what we are about!!!


Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 210
   Posted 3/27/2009 7:16 AM (GMT -7)   
Dear cw123, I will certainly pray for you and your family. I will pray for hope. I have'nt experienced the point of begging to die, but I have quietly wanted to. It breaks my heart to see someone in so much pain because of this fibro. Are you sure its just fibro? Or is she diagnosed with something else that flares the fibro up more. I am glad you have come to this site, perhaps your wife could find some peace talking to others on here, It sure has helped me tremendously!
Fibromyalgia, Hashimoto Thyroid disease, Chronic pain.
 All things are possible thru Christ Jesus who strengthens me

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 378
   Posted 3/27/2009 7:27 AM (GMT -7)   

I am so sorry to her about your wife.  What a terrible experience you had to go thru.  Hopefullly she is feeling better.  I am sure she could benefit from this forum if she is up to it.  The moderators and ladies and gents here are FANTASTIC!!!!  We welcome you and your wife. Your family will be in my prayers


anxiety/panic attacks...osteoporosis....Fibro

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 17501
   Posted 3/27/2009 10:15 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi, CW, and welcome!  It must be hard watching your wife when she is in so much pain.  She was probably having an attack of costochondritis when her diaphram was being affected.  I get that sometimes and it really does hurt!  But the good news is that fibro waxes and wanes.  We will have our really miserable times and then we will have better times.  The key is learning how to control the pain.  That's what we are here for.

It would be wonderful if your wife would come on and ask questions.  We could hopefully help her and that would help you and your family.  No one totally understands fibromyalgia unless they have it!  YIKES!  smhair   But it is so wonderful that you are trying to get the help for her.  She is very fortunate to have you.

Be sure to check out the Fibro 101 thread...the second thread on the forum.  There are links to good info about fibro in there that can help you understand this illness more and help your wife, too. 

I am so glad that you found us and joined in.  This is a wonderful group of people that love to help others and we really do care about eact other too.  See if you can get your wife to join in, also.  We'd love to "meet" her.  Meanwhile, read back post, the Fibro 101 thread, and ask questions.  We are here to help you.  Hope to hear more from you soon.


Forum Moderator/ Fibromyalgia
Fibromyalgia, Crohn's Disease, Ostomy, Diabetes, Autoimmune Inner Ear Disease, Osteoporosis
God does not give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.    2 Timothy 1:7

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 1014
   Posted 3/27/2009 11:08 AM (GMT -7)   

Hello CW,

You have my most sincere prayers right now.  I'm so sorry you, your wife and family has been hit so hard by this horrible syndrome.  I know how hard it is to watch someone we love suffer. 

This forum is for anyone that is impacted by fibro so you are very welcome here. 

Last October I was very ill with fibro and wound up in the hospital.  I wasn't nearly as sick as your wife but I remember instructing my husband what my final wishes were, in the event I didn't make it.  I'm doing MUCH better now. I had had what Sherrine mentioned in her post.. costochondritis, it was enormously painful and very scary.  I've also been through a heavy depression because of this chronic illness and just hoped that God would just take me. It does wax and wane.

I don't know what I would have done without this wonderful group of friends.  They've made me laugh when I wanted to cry.  They've reminded me that I'm an important part of the world and that someone cares when I feel like just giving up.

I admire you so much for coming to this forum to learn more and get support.  We are a Family here and we always welcome new family members so please, please, please don't hesitate coming back, bring your wife along, we'd love to meet her and welcome her to the family as well.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you and your family is doing.. you'll be in my thoughts.

Take care, 

Fibormyalgia, 4x Lyme Disease Survivor, Depression, Anxiety Disorder, Dyslexia, 2 Lumbar Disk Herniations, Allergies, Bi-lateral Carpal Tunnel, Psoriasis. 
Meds = Elavil, Tramadol, Xanax, Lipitor
"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars" - author unknown

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 386
   Posted 3/27/2009 11:20 AM (GMT -7)   

Welcome! Sorry your wife and you are having tough times right now. As Sherrine said about costochondritis sounds possible in your wife's pain. I get chest/rib pain but not like a lot of the other ladies on this forum that have costo.

They first local support group I went to my husband went with me. He "shared" in the group meeting and he said it was very infomative as far as hearing and meeting others like me. I was very glad he was with me and he is always been very supportive of me.

Hope to hear from you and your wife soon. Give her a very gentle hug from us.

Dx Fibro 1/2008, gastritis
600mg Gabapentin, 50mg Pristiq, Ultracet and/or Fentanyl patch as needed, Vitamin D3, Menopausal Support Multi-vitamin

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 726
   Posted 3/27/2009 11:39 AM (GMT -7)   
CW, Welcome to the forum.  As you can see this is a very caring group of people & it sounds like you & your wife could use abit of loving attention.  I am so sorry you have had to go through this, I feel badly that your wife was in such pain.  We can help you & your wife make it through those really tough times.  Knowledge is power with this illness & believe me the best thing you could have done for your wife & yourself, was to come here & learn all you can about the illness/illnesses your wife is dealing with.  It would do her a world of good to learn how to pace herself, how to lean on you when things are bad, how to come here & cry & vent when she feel there is nothing left to her life but pain.  To come here & help others make it through their bad times is rewarding & takes the focus off ourselves.  She still has a life & it is worth finding, it is not the life she had before but we have all had to mourn that & move on.  She can have a very good & happy life & for me that included coming here to these good people for help.  You have made the first step, I know it can be overwhelming but let us help you with that.  I am so glad you have found us.  Good for you!!!  Gentle hugs, Denise  

 I have:  Fibromyalgia, ME/CFS, Holt-Oram Syndrome, nasal allergies, food allergies, depression, TMJ, anxiety  Married to a wonderful supportive husband & between us we have 4 children & 7 grandchildren As apples of gold in silver carvings is a word spoken at the right time for it.    Prov. 25:11

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 1279
   Posted 3/28/2009 7:26 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi cw and Welcome!

Your story saddens me, because we still have Dr's out there that don't believe this is real. The fibro hit me hard also, and I almost checked myself in to the hospital a couple times. I could not function, and if I walked even 5 ft. the pain was so excrutiating it knocked me to my knees. On a scale of 1 to 100, I was functioning at a 5. It has been a long journey since last March, but I do have quality of life now.

I can't imagine how hard this was for my family and friends to go through, and thank-you, it's a reminder to talk with all of them at some point and say "this had to have been hard on you too", now that I am functioning again.

The group here is very special and they have made a "difference" in my life. They were my "strength" when I had none. It sounds like you are very supportive of your wife, and let her know about the site, maybe just have her read the posts for awhile and then when she is comfortable have her join in. I think she would notice a change in how she feels.

Nice to meet you and let us know how it is going-




Fibromyalgia, Depression, Anxiety, TMJ, Arthritis/neck, SAD
Zoloft, Tylenol 4000 mg., Darvocet  

New Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 3/30/2009 9:47 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey CW123!
Stay strong!
I was in the opposite position as your wife!
my was telling MY mom that I wanted to go... and that i just wanted to be pain free.
My mom had no idea what to do, but all you can do verbally is keeping positive!
I had extreme chest pains and all the joint pains, irrital bowel syndromes and the good stuff that comes with this terrible thing that people tend to take lightly.
BUT! im now free/95% free of it now. NO JOKE. a family friend of mine introduced me to xango. its a mangosteen juice that is an anti inflammatory fruit. If you want more information, trust me id be MORE than happy to get your wife and your life back together. i was always in a BAAD mood and ruined everyones life.. and i felt terrible. now, im paying them back by being healthy. keep your head up!!!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 3/30/2009 11:48 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello CW123!!

And Yes, you are in the right place. Anyone who has or loves someone who has fibro is very welcome here. It truly is a family disorder as you said. I also will pray for some peace and comfort for your family. Also please ask your wife to join this family. We'd love to have you both. My hubby is a member also. Doesn't post often but he does read and it helps him to understand what I go through day to day.

Keep us posted on how she is doing but also how YOU are holding up. How can we help you too???
Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, Ulcerative Colitis, Insulin dependent diabetic, PTSD, dermatitis herpetiformus, osteoarthritis and a few other side dishes.
Happiness is something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for."

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 6067
   Posted 3/31/2009 8:35 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi and welcome CW. I hope your wife will join us too. Fibro is a family disorder it affects everyone around you and involved in your life. I so hope your wife is doing better. You are a great husband for reaching out in her behalf.
Read, ask questions and we will be here for your family.
luv and hugs
Forum Moderator Fibromyalgia
Fibro,Sjogrens, Anxiety, Gastroparesis, IBS, Gastritis, Allergies, High Blood Pressure, Low Blood Sodium and Osteoarthritis
Amitriptyline, Celexa, Xanax, Synthroid, Zyrtec, Micardis, Spironalactone, Tylenol, Reglan, Lidoderm Patches and Tramadol
Co Q 10, Super B Complex, Extra B12, Multi vitamin

New Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 4/1/2009 7:14 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you to all. It has been a long and challenging 9 years. I have read alot of postings, and I do agree with the all natural stuff. We are trying the all natural route now. It was a forced option because after 9 years of meds, her kidneys and liver were having major problems. To date she has a pain level of about a 2 and is on no meds at all. Her blood pressure also came back into a normal range. We are really praying that it continues to have great results. All of this cold rainy weather coming in will show the real resuls. That normally sets of an episode. If anyone want to know what we are doing that works let me know. I can tell you we found out the hard way that common meds is only a temp fix, and cause more problems in the end.
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